Why Me?
by Kaeru Shisho
Summary: Trowa is pushed into dating Duo in order for Heero to see what he lost, realize his mistakes, and get back together. Will that work? Really? Who's stupid idea was that?
1. Chapter 1

**Why Me? **

Summary: Trowa is pushed into dating Duo in order for Heero to see what he lost, realize his mistakes, and get back together. Will that work? Really?

Disclaimer: I can't claim the GW characters, just write about them and drool

Warnings: AU, language, male x male

A/N: This was started years ago and I resurrected it and Waterlily edited it, for which I am very grateful. Hope you like it!

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**Chapter 1**

**(o) Trowa's POV**

"Bread stick?" Duo asked me.

"Thanks." I sunk my teeth into the presented piece before it bobbed out of reach and yanked it out of his hand, my ridiculousness eliciting a small laugh from him. I chewed and swallowed, recovering my dignity, and then offered him, "More wine?"

"Um, just a tad more, and in my glass, please," he added with a twinkle in his eye. "I'm not much of a drinker, ya know."

I didn't before, but now I did now. Duo Maxwell was a terrific guy all around. I was just getting to know him after being acquainted for years.

So.

I asked myself _why_? Why was I on a date with my best friend's recently turned ex-boyfriend, when I had my own lover? Not to mention that my lover, Quatre, knew where I was and with whom and that it was his idea for me to be here doing this. And that my best friend, inconveniently also Duo's ex, knew I'd made this all happen.

Why? It was really all too strange to put into words, and truly awkward to put into motion.

I needed my head examined for going along with this.

I could, at least, say that it hadn't been my idea at all.

It was a stupid idea from the start.

I was coerced.

As I recall, though, I'd tried to the last to avoid it.

It began with a strange conversation with Quatre, which had followed one started by me about work and how it sucked some days, which he will want to tell someone about later, I'm pretty sure, so I won't.

"It doesn't surprise me that it led to their breakup, considering, but their splitting up is just wrong," he concluded after hearing the details of my previous work-related story.

"I'm not sure," I told him. "If they weren't getting along sharing an apartment, then maybe they shouldn't force it."

"But Heero and Duo love each other!"

I wasn't into disputing the finer points of other people's relationships, so I shrugged. The fact that they had broken up made their feelings for each other arguable from my point of view.

"We must get Heero to see how much he needs Duo and how inflexible he is."

"Why?" I wondered aloud, having a habit of questioning everyone's motives, including mine.

"To get them back together, so they will be happy again."

Maybe they were happier now. I knew better than to say that aloud. It was obvious to me that Quatre believed what he said, and that was that Heero and Duo were meant to be together and could only find fairytale-like happiness in that blissful state. I had my doubts, that's all. "If it's true, they will."

He had his hands on his hips and a little frown on his face, which was turned up to mine. "No, they won't. Not when they are as pigheaded as they both are. We must get things rolling."

"You want me to talk to Heero about… his love life?" I suppose I looked sorrowful. I felt as if he was about to condemn me to an early death.

"Oh, no!" he laughed lightly, pooh-poohing the notion entirely. He wasn't blind to my limitations, but lucky for me he often turned a blind eye towards them. "I'll take care of Heero. You'll date Duo and—"

"I'll do _what_?"

And it got weirder after that. If possible. Our morning rush to get to work making the discussion taper off, unfinished, for my part, but I had the last word, "No."

Almost.

"You can do it. I just KNOW it," he shouted as he skipped to his car.

I watched him buzz off with a cheery wave. I felt no reason to return it.

Frickin' impossible. Not on my life, his life, or any innocent's life caught in the crossfire was that happening.

Shit. He'd be counting on me to carry through, though. I hated to disappoint Quatre.

Well.

I could fade into nonexistence when called for out of necessity. There was no way I'd run into Duo by accident and I surely wasn't dumb enough to seek him out. I felt marginally better going into Preventers with a battle plan.

And then the bad start to the day pissed out spores that grew like a fungus. Unseen tendrils sought me out to entrap me again.

"Barton." Chang Wufei stood before me. I didn't let on how much his smirk irritated me, or how much he reminded me of a fungal growth at that moment. "I assume you've been apprised of the situation and have approached Maxwell?"

I didn't pretend ignorance. Not only would that not get me out of the situation, but it would give Chang the chance to repeat what Quatre had said and rub it in. I was feeling put out and for a high-quality reason. "Why me?"

I made the mistake of leaving an eye visible as I looked for an escape route. He maneuvered around, hovering at my elbow, blocking my path, and preventing me from dodging out on him; a dutiful Preventer agent he was.

"Who else would be believable?" he asked.

Okay, there had to be some other sucker available, although it certainly would not be Chang. Ever since hooking up with the Preventers organization, the fungus refused to take part in any "idiotic escapades" that might "taint his image." And that was pretty much a quote. I sure as hell didn't talk that way.

"Chuck in accounting." I offered him up because he was gay and single and not good-looking enough to be a real threat.

"Don't make me laugh."

Was that even possible? I don't think I'd ever heard Chang laugh aloud.

"He wouldn't even make a decent grease spot after Heero was through with him."

"And _I_ would?" I asked, not appreciating the back-handed compliment at all.

He brushed off my comment with the chalk dust on his pants leg. "No, there's no one else. In spite of their well-publicized break up, no one in this building will even look at Maxwell with a hint of lust for fear of repercussions from Yuy. I believe that would hold true even if, God forbid, Yuy was ever killed in combat."

"If you think he'd rise from the dead to knock-off Duo's prospective suitors, then there is no reason to do this at all."

He managed to look down his nose at me even though I stand several inches taller. "It's imperative that they both be clear-headed, and apart they sulk like a couple of roosters refused entrance to the hen house- proving they aren't capable of putting all this," his hands drew an imaginary circle in the air, generously encompassing me into the big picture he was creating, "past them and concentrate properly. We can't wait for Yuy to come to his senses, and God knows Maxwell's impossible."

I drifted off at that point. I hadn't noticed Heero being anything but his mildly broody self at work. He'd seemed unchanged to me and perfectly capable of carrying out his assigned missions without flaw. Duo was sociable and sometimes loud, but I wouldn't call him "impossible", ever, even now. Emotional, both, but no different today than from a month ago. What he needed was a less dangerous job with better hours and a commander that wouldn't let him throw away his life on treacherous missions. "I disagree with your entire assessment." With that summarization of my analysis over, I moved to leave.

He countered with a slide to intercept me. His mouth hung open longer than was attractive before it snapped into a thin line. We conducted a staring contest until he conceded the loss.

I should have suspected he had one more ace up his sleeve, though. His prim sneer returned.

"Winner agrees one hundred percent with me, and so does Merquise."

Merquise? What the fuck did that asshole's opinion matter here? Invoking his name only intensified how unimpressed I was with Chang's argument. I curled a lip.

His skill set hadn't grown to include reading my body language, though, because he chose to interpret my silence as agreement and satisfied his sense of correctness enough to continue. "_We_ must set a plan in motion now. Yuy must be made to realize how much he has lost. Certainly Winner explained all that to you already?"

He nearly called me a "numbskull." I could see his lips move even though no sound escaped. It might have been "blockhead."

I wasn't completely insensitive; I simply didn't draw the same conclusions. As much as I didn't want to say anything or get involved, the only way I was going to get Chang to leave me alone was to state my case, and make it snappy. "I know about their fight. My point is that if you're so sure Yuy needs Duo in his life let him come to that realization in his own time—all by himself."

Wufei shook his head. "Yuy needs a kick in the ass."

The directions I could have taken _that_ line were numerous, but mostly downhill, seeing as Yuy was gay and Chang was not_- probably_ not, he hadn't dated man or woman to my limited knowledge- so I restricted my remarks. "Take him kick boxing." This action seemed far, far simpler, and, importantly, excluded my participation.

"Metaphorically speaking." There was that silent "numbskull" handle again. "It has to be _you_ taking an interest, dating him, or—"

"Merquise," I offered the alternative. He was an option that Chang had himself brought up so I couldn't be blamed for doing so. "He's in agreement with you, you said. Yuy's not fond of him, to say the least." And that was the most delicate wording possible to describe Heero's dislike of Zechs. It surprised me to have said it, actually. "Let _him_ date Duo."

"Absolutely off the table."

"Because-?"

"Maxwell reports to him. It would be improper. Entirely."

"I guess." Forgot that detail. Chang wasn't giving me other reasons, but getting brought up on breach of conduct charges wouldn't look good on anyone's résumé come review time.

"No question about it. It must be you."

"It could be you," I told him, already knowing what he'd say to that.

He gave a fungal sigh and rubbed the ridge of his nose, eyes closed. "That wouldn't do at all."

Oh, you're not gay, right? I guess that would have been insultingly obvious to have pointed out, so I didn't and he didn't.

Now his beady black eyes pinned me in place. "I was over this already with Winner. Didn't he make your role clear?"

"Quatre called me _flexible_." That had been the night before last.

"I'm- not touching that statement with a Gundanium-coated harpoon." His dark eyes misted over for a fraction of a second before hardening back to said Gundanium hardness.

He'd been scuba diving in the Bahamas for his vacation. I'd heard rumors that he hadn't been alone the entire time, but I had no idea who the mystery person could have been. Nor had I cared to invent possible Chang playmates. I imagined the feel of a harpoon in my hands instead, but that was too fun.

Killing the smile that had begun to erupt and spread to my lips, I said, "You think I'm expendable." It's what he'd been implying.

Wufei stamped his foot and huffed. "No, you are not! You are believable in the role, and safe. Heero won't actually kill one of his close friends. Besides, Winner agreed. He's already spreading the rumor that you two have broken up."

"!" What the _hell_?!

"It's either you or Qua-."

"Stop!"

There was only one likely name to follow that "or". Chang was going to say "Quatre", and toss him into the fairy ring. I couldn't take that. I definitely had to nip that blossoming "or" notion in the bud—stop the spawning of worse fungal entanglements.

Quatre dating Duo had always been niggling fear in the back of my mind. Quatre always seemed to need more in the way of response than I was capable of, and Duo seemed equipped with reaction to spare, feedback both active and vocal, from the moment he woke up to when he crashed at night, or so Heero said, and I believed him.

I knew I'd fall apart if I had to stand aside and watch Quatre flirt with Duo. I'd imagined it, let the whole scenario play across my mind, and just _that_ act devastated me.

I was that unsure of myself after all these years.

I never proposed being perfect in any way.

But then I'd always suspected the two of them had some history neither wanted to admit. A little unfinished business back on L4 once upon a time? Or maybe it was just my imagination and insecurity working in concert. Well, that's just where I wanted it to stay, a bit of dark fantasy musical.

So, I'd do it. "I'll do it," I said.

"Of course," he said.

I didn't look at Chang's face. I knew what I'd see there: the deliberately arrogant expression of a man who prevailed once again. "It's just," I set my jaw and glared as best I could to show my extreme dislike for the plan, "I'm not looking forward to it."

"You should appreciate Winner's faith in you."

Indeed. I should have been grateful that Quatre didn't lack confidence in me. He had no problem with me being the bait. "Never in a thousand and one days or nights would you be untrue, take it too far, or fail me"—just to quote him as proof of his certain resolve and loyalty. And his last words this morning as we parted for work, "You can do it. I just KNOW it."

Damn. Frickin' hell damn.

I'da hoped Wufei _the Dazzling_ Chang would have found an alternative. But I should have known he'd lack the creativity. I had no brilliant ideas either, so, well, there it was.

"Not looking forward to dating Maxwell? He charmed Yuy so he can't be all that terrible for company."

"I didn't mean it that way."

Dam_nation_. I made the mistake of catching sight of his face. I wished Chang hadn't been looking so fucking smug.

"You'll do just fine. Heero needs to learn to curb his pride."

I could say the same for you, Chang-Fusilli, pestilence supreme. I thought that very, very hard and folded my arms over my chest for protection. It worked, because he didn't punch me for thinking.

"If he values Duo's affection, as we all believe, he will respond." He tagged on a condescending sniff and polished his nails on his starched cuff.

"Oh, he'll respond." I knew Heero would. "That's what I'm not looking forward to."

That show of weakness earned me a derisive snort and a stern glare. "I must get back to work. I suggest you start with a dinner invitation. Maxwell likes Thai."

"I don't need your suggestions," I grumbled. I felt like I was fifteen again, stumbling through my first attempt at a date-like-thing with Quatre, which was more of a walk-n-talk with a few awkward touches thrown in.

"Naturally. Just entertain him with sleight of hand tricks for all I care."

We left the coffee shop, me sulky and him incensed, and fast-stepped back to the Preventers building, filing one after the other through security, up the elevator, to the Code-Red Ops division.

"He shouldn't see us together."

"Why-?" I started to ask him, but I didn't bother to finish.

The "he" in this case was Heero, with his back to us talking on phone while flipping through a file. Unless it was the other player in this act, Duo, who had a knee hitched upon the corner of a desk, chatting up the pretty new agent, a woman, so nothing _untoward_ was going on.

Chang had headed off to the men's room, leaving me to weave my way to my desk and to think. I just couldn't help wondering why three competent Preventers agents couldn't come up with a better scheme to get those two back together.

I liked my plan, which was to let them work it out on their own. Give them space and time and allow them to fix what needed fixing and move on. Even getting Merquise and Une to connive Duo into a lesser workload… Comparing the Winner-Chang plan to my own kept my brain occupied for the rest of the morning. I felt satisfied knowing how right I was and buried the other ideas before lunch, making my instant cup-of-noodles and canned clamato drink a pleasant coin-operated eating experience.

Then, in the afternoon, I spotted Duo again at the coffee urn, and this guilt-producing little voice in my head surfaced, breaking through my established calm: "You can do it. I just KNOW you can." When supplemented by the earnest eyes and accompanying smile of my boyfriend, I gave up fighting what—apparently- everyone had determined had to be done by me and me alone.

Frickin' Hell.

I grabbed my Preventers issue blue mug and ambled his way.

"Hey." He smiled at me with a toss of his braid.

"Hey." I watched his rope of hair sway and his coffee cup fill and asked, "How'yer doing?" I hated talking about feelings, mine or anyone else's. Better left boxed up and hidden. Exposure only made them fester, was my opinion.

His expression grew concerned, his eyes soulful, as he replied, "I oughta be asking _you _that."

Why? Oh, yeah. Quatre and I were supposed to have broken off. Fuck it all. "Fine."

I thought about filling my mug, while watching him dump two packets of sugar into his and then reach for the creamer.

He looked up expectantly, waiting for me to say something more, probably, so I said, "It's been, ah, coming on for a while."

"Yeah, same for me, too. Work's been covering for my free time," he said. "Or it would if someone hadn't stepped in and ruined that Columbia shit mission."

That had been me. "Yeah, um-" Could I hold my breath until I passed out?

"Yeah, you woulda been okay on the mission, watchin' my back? But then Merquise… damn… I didn't think he'd screw me outta that."

Thank _God_ he hadn't discovered all the shenanigans behind that. I'd have to thank Merquise for covering for me, too. Frickin' hell's bells. "There is that."

"Yeah. Thanks. I knew I could count on you for the right measure of sympathy. None of that sappy crap I've been getting."

In light of his warm smile, I felt what little resolve I had melt away. I jumped in before I changed my mind or he walked away. "Ah, would you like to go, um, out? Dinner?"

"Huh? Dinner?"

Did I need to define a date? "I thought about trying the new Thai place and, ah, maybe drinks or dessert at—" not at Quatre's favorite French pastry shop!

"Voodoo Doughnuts!" Duo grinned and jabbed the air with his fingers in some odd, but probably meaningful, gesture. He shook off the resulting puddle of coffee-sugar-creamer he'd spilt over his hand. "Love that place and it's just around the corner." His smile wavered and his eyes looked a tad less open, hooded, and even migrated to downright wary. I couldn't believe I was fooling him with this act. "This just you and me, right?"

God, yes. "Yeah. A—" just say the damn word, Barton! "A date. Just you and me."

I think he looked paler. I _felt_ paler.

"Okay. Tonight?"

"It's Friday," I argued, as if the day of the week mattered so much. "If you're not overloaded here." Let's get this over with.

"Okay. Sure. Sounds great."

It sounded more like a disaster-in-the-making to me. And I felt the correctness of that assessment a second later. I'd managed to hold Duo's attention long enough to attract Yuy's notice, because I could see a rakish tuft of his hair sailing over the cubicles and it was headed our way. If I left now I could make it back to my desk before he arrived.

But Duo was still talking to me!

"Whaaat… time?" he asked slowly, drawing out the words. He didn't appear to be in any particular hurry to part company.

"I'll make reservations for seven?" Now, turn and go before having to face them both together—not done.

"Do you want to meet there, or what?" Duo asked.

I couldn't let him pick me up; I was living with Quatre, who I'd just told Duo, more or less, that I was no longer seeing. That would not work. Think, Barton! "I'll drive. We can just leave from here." Heero was rounding the corner and I wanted to live to see tomorrow!

I caught Duo's gaze sliding over to Heero's direction. That seemed to amuse him and he smiled. "An early dinner?"

Before I could disappear, Heero had arrived.

Duo smiled rakishly. "Sure. Cool. It's a **date,** then." His emphasis.

I felt Heero's tension before I saw him, and heard his growl before I wanted to. "What is?" he asked.

"Not that it's your business," Duo told Heero tartly, "but Trowa and I are going out tonight."

Suddenly, Duo was gone, and I was left standing at the coffee urn with Yuy. That's not as special as it sounds, either.

"Have fun." Heero said it like a death wish. My death. As in "have –**die, Barton, die** - fun".

Yeah. Well. Yeah.

It wasn't until I was back at my desk with the door securely battened down that I was slammed by this total exhaustion and when I raised my mug to take a sip of caffeine rejuvenation, I realized I'd neglected to actually pour any coffee.

Why fight it? I rested my head on my arms, cleared my head of all thoughts, and closed my eyes.

So with the unexpected excitement of having Yuy's "consent", I took his ex out on a date that evening. Which brought us back to where we started, at the restaurant eating a bread stick, or a bit further into the salad plates a few minutes later…

"You look, ah, terrific, 'Tro. And this is a great place."

"Thanks." Shit, the conversation was about to deteriorate into talking in platitudes. After all these years working near, sorta knowing Duo, and I couldn't think of a damn thing worth saying. "I, ah, had a nap this afternoon."

"You did? That's cool. Never could do that at work. Always someone calling or pounding on my door."

We took turns stabbing at our lettuce. "Got it." I shoved the leaf in my mouth as an excuse for not talking.

Lucky for me, it was Duo sitting across the table, and he was rarely at a loss for words. "Did I tell you about the KT space-jumper up for sale?" he asked.

The tiny, two-man shuttle run-abouts were popular, but no longer available new since the KT company folded. I jumped at the topic like an acrobat for the grab bar. "No, where?"

"Just the local shuttle base. But Howard contacted me about it."

"He's still _alive_?"

"Yeah, of all the doctors, he made it through."

"I knew that much, it's just, well, he's getting on in years and I haven't had any reason to contact him."

"We keep in touch."

Yeah, Duo would be one to keep in contact even if the job didn't require him to do so. That didn't say much for my networking skills. "That's nice." God, how lame a response was that? _Nice._ Not even 'interesting' or 'remarkable'. What _did _Quatre see in me? Maybe I was _that good_ in bed, because it couldn't possibly be my conversational skills that kept him coming back for more of my company. "Have you tested it out?"

"The jumper? Only the video tour, ya know? Not in too bad a condition. Needs engine work, but it works."

"You serious about getting it?" I hadn't flown in ages. I missed it. Would Duo let me borrow it? The notion intrigued me more than I'd expected.

"I wanna take a look at it first, of course, and there's the problem of funds. I'm okay for the payments, but I got no lump savings to pony up for a deposit."

I spoke without thinking anything through, a rare event. "I could do that, if you want a partner, that is."

His eyes lit up and he smiled. I thought there was nothing like Quatre's smile, but Duo's was a close second. It spread to include me in its warmth.

"That could be cool. With your engineering skills, we could have it fixed in no time, if there aren't bigger problems than advertised."

"Maybe we should go take a look?"

"You really want to? I have an appointment, tentative, you know, for Saturday morning."

Tomorrow.

I wasn't sure if he really wanted me to tag along or not, until he said, "It would be great timing, for me, getting your expert opinion and all. Yeah, I'd appreciate the second set of eyes; if you don't mind, that is."

And I found myself falling into his plans immediately. "I got nothing goin' on tomorrow." Except, maybe, lounging in bed with my _actual_ boyfriend. I stood to get my scheduler out of my back pocket.

"Man, that would be perfect. It wasn't something… you know… _he_ was interested in."

"He" being "Heero".

And then like black magic or something, I saw him- where "him" equaled "Heero - materialize where he shouldn't have been—in a chair at a nice window table. And not just that-!

I felt as if I'd been shot full frontal with a stun gun on narrow-band impact. I must have let my mouth hang open, giving away my complete and total shock, because Duo twisted around in his chair nearly falling as he hopped to his feet while trying to get a look.

"Holy crap! It's Quat and 'Ro!"

So it was. My Quat. His 'Ro. Together. On a date. At the same restaurant I'd picked.

What the _fuck _was going on?

Not only were they there but—

"Hey! What's Quat doing hugging Yuy?"

I did not know.

"I never thought they were that close."

They weren't.

"'Course, knowing Quat, he probably just thought Heero needed a hug or something."

Or something. They had never been close, and flirting was not in any game plan I knew about.

"You okay, Tro'?"

I'd give them a few minutes and then I was calling Quat.

"Good 'nuff."

**(o) Heero's POV**

"Agent Yuy. A moment of your time?"

I looked up into the steely gray eyes of Zechs Merquise and immediately regretted it. I hated having to look up at him. As far as I was concerned, I was the better man. I came out of the war the hero and he the fallen dark angel, the burned out Lightening Count, the current Agent Wind (of the hot air, as some joked). He should have gone to Mars colony _and stayed_; instead, he sailed back to work for Une.

I couldn't fault him for that act of attrition, because enter Preventers had I, and Chang, Barton, and Duo, leaving me little to feel superior about job-wise. He could have least lost his legs at the knee and been shorter. To be fair. So I could look down on him.

"-It's really for the best, you'll agree?"

"What is?" I didn't pretend to have been following him.

"You making Duo see the error of his ways?"

I hated that we had found common ground upon which to agree. I hated to admit Merquise could ever have a correct assessment, especially about Duo. Suddenly, I wanted to think better of Duo.

Duo reported to the man. I'd always admired how he did that. I couldn't have. There!

"Possibly," I said. I'd give the senior agent that. Just because he or I couldn't think of another solution, didn't mean there wasn't a better one.

I missed having Duo in my life at home.

And then I didn't. I didn't miss the fighting. But I kept forgetting we weren't… together any more. He'd left a hole the size of a Gundam incendiary blast-tear inside me. Things would never be the same and I missed the comforting routines we'd developed.

But not the danger he got into on missions, my subsequent, gut-wrenching trips to the hospital hoping to find him in better condition than reported, or the bitter days of his recuperation that would follow.

Our arguments had usually revolved around his quitting and getting a less risky job, like I had. Information retrieval over the internet didn't require I fire a weapon, or get one fired at me. Why couldn't he get a job like that? Why didn't he understand my side of things?

Merquise was still ranting. "-Duo must learn that the world doesn't revolve around him. He needs his comeuppance, and you, Agent Yuy, of all people, know that. I don't know how you tolerated his egocentricity for so long."

Then that smarmy smile appeared. Like he knew things he shouldn't about my private life. And because I hadn't said anything to refute him, he went on, "and then maybe _I_ do. He does have the most amazing eyes and that hair—"

"Yes!" _Shut up!_ "I know." Duo was stunning. I knew that. I couldn't be at work without seeing him and being reminded that he wasn't mine anymore. I certainly didn't need any reminders of what I couldn't touch or hear or smell or see whenever I wanted. His laugh, bubbling up from deep inside his chest, the dark brown swirls of hair nesting at the base… of his cock-

"—which means you ought to enjoy a nice evening out with Mr. Winner."

The chestnut swirls bleached to blond and my blood pressure dropped like a rock. I nearly swooned in shock, realizing how his words had shaped my imagination against my will. Me, go out with Quatre Raberba Winner? Ha! How did that follow? And then, how much of the conversation had I missed?

"Steady there."

My excellent, natural reactions turned my temporary lapse into an intentional step backwards, and discouraged his hand from threatening to enter my personal space. "Hn."

His amused expression turned speculative. "Has he ever shown you his art collection?"

My defenses shot to full alert. Was Merquise alluding to a sleazy sexual encounter between Quatre Winner and myself? "Would you like to see my … collection? _wink, wink_"—that kind of invitation? I felt my fists reflexively knot tighter as I put on the darkest frown I dared in the presence of a superior (no, never superior!) a _senior _officer.

Or was he actually, really and truly _only_ referring to Quatre's priceless assortment of Impressionist paintings?

I didn't want to jump to any erratic conclusions, so, I asked, "What do you mean by that?"

"It was featured in Modern Homes anthology last month," the pompass-ass-peer-of-the-realm-turned-Preventers-commander replied, "Or the month before that. I was thinking, if you hadn't seen it first-hand before, that you could begin with that, throw in a dinner invitation. I heard him remark about wanting to try the new Thai restaurant."

Preventers Commander Merquise calling Quatre Winner of Winner Universal Enterprises was a highly unlikely chance encounter. "When were you talking to him?"

The tension released across the tall man's shoulders and I knew I'd erred and fallen into his trap.

"Oh! I called Mr. Winner about the article-."

I noticed how his voice had taken on a warmer tone, leaving me to assume that our conversation was taking the direction he'd wanted in the first place. I wished he didn't look so pleased to have slipped this past me.

Why couldn't he just speak plainly, like Trowa? Like Duo. I knew that I'd been set up for this discussion from the start and had been too feeble to avoid it.

"-And he apprised me of his recent break up with Barton."

What?! No! When had that happened? "He and Trowa… broke up? He never said-" But then, Barton and I rarely discussed our personal lives, even though I considered him a close friend. Still, this was a huge turn of events. "When?"

"It's been coming on, I suppose, but only recently have they parted."

"They were happy last week." I was sure of that, having had lunch with them both and having had to avoid a discussion of Duo with the business mogul friend of his…ours. I chanced a glance to see that Zechs' steely blues looked sincere.

"That was before…" He sighed meaningfully. "He could use an old friend to lean on," he said. His smile stretched to show off a perfect line of white teeth.

I controlled the impulse to knock them out. "Quatre has Duo to talk to, if he wants to talk. Why me?"

Zechs appeared solemn for an appropriate measure of time before changing gears again. "You would do us all a favor if you'd take him out. It would cheer up the boy, and at the same time demonstrate to Duo that he's not the only suitable, available _hottie_ in the field."

"Is that an order?"

"Dear, God, Yuy. No, don't be ridiculous. This is among colleagues- and friends."

"Hn." I'd think about it, although it seemed more fitting for me to ask out Trowa; he seemed more suitable, seeing as we worked for the same organization with fewer scheduling problems to interfere. Whatever did Quatre Winner and I have in common beyond crossing paths in the war? And a few friends.

"Why are you getting involved?" I asked.

"Because I want peace in the workplace, and you _are_ my friends. Shouldn't I want your lives to be contented ones?"

And he presented that statement so artfully that I imagined he'd practiced saying it in a mirror. I tried to come up with a straightforward but tactful way of telling him to mind his own fucking business, when my cell buzzed, and Merquise excused himself.

Work was often pestering me to take notice. "Yuy, here."

Research results were required.

That I could do. No more killing and risking of my life—just running down the bad guys the clean way. If only Duo would do the same, make a change, then I wouldn't be considering calling Winner for… a date.

"Yes," I told the field agent who'd called, "I have prepared the Leesburg file already. What do you want to know?"

Agents new and old kept me busy all morning. There was a note penciled in for noon, but a coffee stain had long smudged it to the undecipherable stage. A lunch appointment with Duo, long forgotten and now not going to happen. I felt sad. A deep longing for his company pulled my mood into a sink hole until the lunch hour was past. It was really better when I forgot I wasn't in love anymore.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

**Why Me?**

**Chapter 2**

* * *

**(o) Heero's POV continued**

What I needed was an afternoon pick-me-up. Coffee would do.

On my way to the coffee station, I was nearly bowled over by Chang, flitting directly to his office.

"That guy ought to take it easy or he'd have a coronary before he hits twenty," commented an agent in passing.

"Yes," I agreed.

Chang needed a companion in his life to be at peace. Duo had said so and said that Quatre had said so, too, and they were in tune with human needs, which made me painfully aware of my own currently unmet needs. I needed my lover back, my heart, but I also needed someone for balance, to share interests with and field a few relationship questions every so often to complete the whole. Someone more than just a comrade in arms, or possibly a dog.

Wufei had been talking about getting a dog recently, and he already had a cat and a bird and a recently acquired aquarium of cichlids, following his trip to the tropics. I doubted pets were doing it for him.

I successfully traced the fastest path to the coffee station, when a cozy scene opened in front of me. There was Duo standing head-to-head with Trowa Barton. Duo was doing most of the talking as I neared. Not an uncommon situation.

"Cool. It's a date, then," he said, in fact.

I'd wanted Duo to find another job elsewhere; being lovers and working daily together and my gentle suggestions, which he claimed were "pressuring him" to find a less demanding job, had "put a strain on our relationship," not to mention the harrowing adventures he'd landed in more than once.

A month ago, our argument got out of hand. He packed a bag and moved out of our apartment that same day, telling me, "I'm 'relieving the strain', as you put it, faster this way."

I hadn't _put it_ that way, _he_ had. Idiot.

Also, 'relieving the strain' hadn't been what I'd meant or how I felt at all, but he'd been uncooperative when I'd tried to get together to talk things over and then he'd retreated mostly to avoidance-mode around me. Still, I had hopes that he'd thought about what I'd said, seen the truth of it, and possibly started looking for an alternate job.

Maybe that was this "date" he was referring to? With Trowa I knew the direct approach was best; with Duo, well, he knew to expect it from me, so I just asked flat out. "What is?"

"Not that it's your business," Duo said to me, more sharply than I deserved, "but Trowa and I are going out tonight."

_Very funny._

Suddenly, Duo was leaving, and I was left standing alone at the coffee urn with Trowa.

"Have fun." I said automatically to his retreating back; I didn't think he'd heard me, but it didn't really matter, since I'd been sarcastic.

Barton looked after him, ashen-faced. I nearly told him not to worry, that I understood how Duo's tactless humor was often inappropriate, but that might have actually insulted the guy. I mean, Trowa had known Duo as long as I had and was used to cynicism; he was the ironic cynic maestro (Duo's words). So, instead I just caught his one green eye and stared, driving in the fact that I understood. I did that until he blinked and then we both parted with empty mugs.

Staring past the dried crust at the bottom of my coffee mug, I saw the image of my own eye.

On reflection, what if it was true? What if Trowa and Duo were actually going out together on a date as he'd stated? That would _also_ explain Barton's shell-shocked manner on seeing me.

I didn't like the idea of Duo dating, but if it was Barton, it wouldn't go far because Winner would have a fit and—no, wait! Had they really called it quits?

The next thing I thought was "poor Quatre."

Obviously, my friends were insane.

I called Trowa and got his voicemail. If he'd wanted to talk, he'd have picked up. He knew who I was and where I was and he could guess at the _why_ with the best of them.

Since I couldn't talk to my friend and knew Duo wouldn't talk to me, I decided to call Quatre and set up a _date_ of our own. Get the facts. He'd need someone to console him, as Merquise had suggested, and I could use his logical and scheming mind to find a way out of the quagmire my life had become.

I called the Thai restaurant and secured reservations first. I liked Thai, that's why I chose it. And it was new. Then I called Quatre Ra_ber_ba Winner.

"Heero? Is that you? How nice a surprise."

"I heard the news."

"News? What news? Oh, about Trowa and me, well yes…"

"We could talk."

"Tonight?"

He invited me up to his skyline condo, adding, "I need to change after work."

Considering Quatre's habits, that could take forever before we had dinner.

"You're dressed now, I take it?" I asked.

"Yes! Of course! I just meant I could clean up a little before—"

"Not necessary," I told him, because it wasn't. It was just me. A little dirt and a wrinkle or two wouldn't matter. "I'll pick you up at work and then dinner and then when you get home you can change into anything you want."

He laughed. "All right."

"I was thinking—" or Zechs had placed the thought in my head, "of the new Thai restaurant."

"That would be wonderful."

The way he said made me shiver. I could feel sparkles in his voice spewing forth from the phone and landing on me. They stuck and I felt the tingling the rest of the afternoon.

No, actually, it was just a pinched nerve from typing too much. The tingling let up just before the end of the day, when I shut down my computer for the weekend. I avoided running into anyone wanting to waylay me into unnecessary conversation, left the building, and picked up Quatre outside the office building where he worked.

"You could have come in," he remarked. "You didn't have to buzz me and wait."

"Would we be here if I had?"

His confused expression meant I had to explain. "I would have gone up and then waited while you finished a few calls and offered to give me a tour and who know what else. We wouldn't have gotten here in the car for another hour."

He just shook his head, not saying anything until he'd buckled up and I'd pulled away from the curb. "You are so driven."

Duo had accused me of that too, but then he'd "loved me for it", he'd said. And I had believed him.

"You are a control freak," I shot back.

"Me?! I am not!"

"Yes, you are. You make everyone wait while you dither."

He leaned over and whispered into my ear, a surprisingly sexy move. "Such a smooth talker you are, Heero. And honest. So refreshing from my other…dates."

"Hn." What else was there to say to a comment like that?

He gripped the armrests while I steered us through dense Friday night downtown traffic and into a gated parking lot.

"Miss flying?" he asked.

"No. I'm happy with my feet planted on Earth." Then I noticed his hands were a little shaky. I know Trowa drove like a maniac, so he ought to have been used to my skillful maneuvering. Still, his day may have been a nerve-wracking one, so I apologized before he could. "Sorry."

"For what?"

"The rush."

"Oh, yes, well, I usually take my time leaving work and avoid the crowded routes." He smiled and I smiled.

"Duly noted."

The restaurant was packed. I was pleased to have reservations so we could be seated immediately. Out of habit, I scanned the dining room, examining the other people. Duo would have speculated I was looking out for enemies. He knew me so well.

All clear, what I could see of it. There were several areas blocked by pots of bamboo.

We were shown to a window table, as requested, where I could sit and observe the other diners. I was wondering whether or not to request the potted plants be removed so I could my visibility would be improved when Quatre made approving noises.

"What a lovely view!" Quatre exclaimed, staring out the window from ten floors up.

I liked the location, too, just not the bamboo barricades, but I decided to drop that suggestion. He thanked the server. We sat and watched as our candle was ignited and water glasses filled, and then the man left us.

"I think you might be interested in my latest project." Quatre reached under his lapel and withdrew a hand-sized computer. Model unknown.

"I'm interested in _that_." I loved small techno devices, the more powerful the better, and his was the latest. No. It wasn't even available on the market yet. I knew the market.

"This? It's in test. I'll order you one to beta."

"Thank you."

"I want you to see what I have stored on it. Here…I've been working on this, ah-," he paused and handed me his computer; as in, he let me extract it from his shaking hands.

I adored the device, light as a feather, excellent clarity. "What's this?" On the view screen, I recognized Wing Gundam Zero as a transformable mobile suit diagram. "What are you doing?" I asked, and not gently.

I must have sounded as if I was accusing him of murder, grand theft, and mayhem, because he sounded defensive. That was my fault. But Wing Zero? That was hazardous tech!

"It's _mine_." He pressed the tablecloth crease smooth, which was quieter than pounding with his fist. "I still own the manufacturing rights."

_Even though it was based on a design by five long-dead engineers_—but I didn't say that. "I suppose, technically."

He had also operated the Mobile suit and the Zero system, but not without doing himself harm. That harm turned out to be temporary, thankfully. All the Gundam pilots had their turn behind the controls of Zero at one time or other and with mixed results. Only Zechs Merquise and I had the capacity- not skill, which was only a small part of controlling it and something all the Gundam pilots had- to operate it without mental breakdown.

"Yes, I do," he assured me as he signaled the sommelier for the legal drug list comprised of champagne, wine, local brews, and a few aperitifs.

I scrolled past the picture and read the highlights. "Armored with Gundanium alloy and powered by an ultra-compact fusion reactor with no ultimate power rating on the upper limits ever measured."

"Oh, it was measured," he assured me with a sly smile, "just never recorded."

"I'll have... whatever you do." I had more important things on my mind now than alcoholic depressants.

What put Wing Zero above all other units, was the cockpit's "Zero System". ZERO was an acronym for Zoning and Emotional Range Omitted. I once had suggested they add a "D", ZEROD, for deadly, but Duo had joked about "Ze Masterful Heero and ze rod of death" enough to get me to drop the idea. When he miss-spoke and called it "Ze Rod of Desire" I couldn't look him in the eye for a week. That was many, many years and a war ago.

Duo. I missed him. Before my thoughts drifted into a melancholy crater of my own making, Quatre's voice cut in.

"You'll recall that the 'Zero System' allowed the pilot's mind to interface directly with the Gundam's combat computer. Just open that bottle and pour. I know it's good," he said to the man who appeared ready to do the cork sniff and tiny taste test. "I'm sorry," he apologized to the man next, "but I own the vineyard, so I _really_ do know."

"Very good, sir," the man smiled and poured and good manners presided once again. He left us the bottle and swept away with his linen and fancy opener.

"What do you know of the exact nature of the Zero System's operation?" I asked, probing at what Quatre was getting at having this information at his fingertips, carrying it in his pocket close to his heart.

"It's very technical, but in short," and he lowered his voice, "it 'sampled' the pilot's thoughts, combining them with incoming combat data before presenting the pilot with various alternate outcomes."

I knew that much. "You're dancing around the 'sampling' part," I noted.

He just sipped his wine and blinked.

"And that 'presentation' left much room for improvement," I said with a slight smile to take the edge off any accusation he might think I was making. I wasn't trying to place all the blame on Quatre- what Zero had done was frightful, but not intentionally so.

"Yes." Quatre swallowed a gulp full of his wine. "Unfortunately, the technology was unrefined; sometimes the data stream flooded the user's mind, overwhelming him so that he couldn't assimilate it."

"More often than not."

If the pilot could make sense of all that data, depending on the pilot's mood, the Zero System could tell him how to achieve total victory, or decisive defeat. While conceivably this could have given pilots an unprecedented advantage by presenting them with the best possible course of action, accessing the pilot's mind had the unhappy side-effect of driving the pilot insane. The mental stresses the Zero System placed on the pilot were mostly too great for any ordinary human to handle, and even the five mad scientists that designed it originally saw the potential danger of their work.

I had thought these plans had been destroyed, but there they were, the schematics for "Zero System" merrily scrolling across the screen. "I didn't think you'd have saved these," I told him. Or that anyone _should _have salvaged any part of it.

I looked up to stare into his eyes. That told me more about what he was thinking. He didn't hide as well as Barton or I did.

There was pain in that expression, and something else, and then he smiled. "Funny, isn't it? I'm more than a little obsessed with this, I know."

That could have explained his borderline nervousness around me. He'd rearranged his service-ware twice, and since he'd moved his napkin to his lap I hadn't seen his hands.

"At least you are aware of your excesses." _As I wish Duo was_. But, I didn't want to start thinking about Duo again—not tonight. "I would have thought Zero would be the last thing you'd want ever to see again."

He leaned forward, a hand appearing to brush the bangs from his eyes. His eyes looked shiny and very bright blue in the candle light. "I suppose I should be better company or you won't want to see me again."

Oh, right. This was supposed to be a date. I consumed my wine like it was water, letting my meta-metabolism take care of its effects. "Some people might question our choice of subjects—for a _date_." I emphasized the word "date" mostly to convince myself it was.

"We aren't ordinary people, though, are we? Trowa and I never actually dated. He just moved in and we went on with life."

"Duo and I…We never dated either," I said, thinking about that. "It was as if … I don't think either of us had any idea what a date was or how to go about it."

"Dating would have been a waste of time, probably. You already knew each other. That's how it was with us; besides, Trowa had nothing and I had it all. It wouldn't have been fair."

"I'm sure you could have worked that out. Anyway, we aren't together anymore. None of us. Do you think that's what caused our problems? Trying to share lives before we were ready-?"

"-I don't think so." He said that quickly, so much so that the words came out nearly before I'd finished with my comment. "I think we shouldn't take our lovers for granted."

Again, he blinked and smiled as if he was keen on pleasing me and anxious as hell, and then relief washed over him as the server returned. "Oh, the menus! Good I'm starving."

We ordered food, dropped the heart-to-heart for a while, and then, I saw something suspicious flying out from behind a potted bamboo. Had it been a braid? Speaking of out-of-the-ordinary people, could that be Duo in the dining room? I stood and craned my neck to the side.

"It's him! Them!" I blurted out. I couldn't believe my eyes. Duo Maxwell _and_ Trowa Barton here. At the same restaurant.

Oh! Was this the _date_ Duo had announced?

I could see Trowa's lips move and then Duo, seeking us out and mouthing, "Holy crap!"

Quatre twisted around in his chair and rose to his feet. "Oh, I see. Well, we can have a nice time over here without them, can't we?" He sounded completely unfazed by what he'd seen, although a tiny frown creased a line between his eyebrows; it came and then it went in the course of a split second.

"Yes." I'd have a good time if it killed me, or someone.

Suddenly I had an armful of slender male and a face full of blond hair as Quatre wrapped me in a tight hug.

"You're such a good friend!" He said it so sincerely I stopped thinking of murdering him; I only imagined shoving him out of my space and through the plate-glass window.

He returned to his chair as our appetizers were delivered. It gave me time to think without talking. I had already polished off my first glass of wine and was well into my second before Quatre had half-emptied his first. I didn't even like wine. I had also counted wrong; I was on my third.

Another of those tiny, fleeting frowns lined Quatre's brow and then he reached into a pocket for his phone and stared. "I'll just shut this off for tonight," he told me with a forced smile. "Just you and me tonight."

"I feel honored."

He clicked his glass to the top of mine and said, "Cheers!"

I murmured something and topped off my glass with a bit more wine and forced myself not to turn so I could watch Duo. In order not to obsess about him and what he and Trowa were up to at the other table, I thought back to a time when Quatre was less stable—_even_ less stable. How truly, completely balanced Winner was these days was questionable, now that I knew he was back to messing with some form of the Zero System.

There was a time when he had tipped the scales to the dark side. That wasn't far in the distant past. Not more than a few years ago, unfortunate circumstances placed a seriously mentally imbalanced Quatre Raberba Winner in space without his beloved Gundam Sandrock. He'd been reeling from the death of his father and had become enemies with the very space colonists he was fighting to free, when he discovered the abandoned work of the five scientists.

Was this his way of reaching out for help? I'd make it my duty to keep him out of trouble this time.

"You were the builder of Wing Zero." I wanted him to feel it was okay, that I was okay with everything. "That alone would have been an unforgettable experience."

"Oh, it was!" Quatre laughed in a totally carefree manner, as if he hadn't cared about the dangers of the Zero System then, and didn't appear to mind now. "One would think that having destroyed an entire space colony would have been enough to get Zero out of my system," he joked weakly.

And nearly killed Trowa, don't forget that detail. Unless he possibly wouldn't mind ridding himself of the man now? Who knew? Not I. "It was an interesting technology," I admitted, scuttling for the safety of dull commentary.

"I think so, too. I'm so relieved. Trowa hasn't been very supportive," he revealed. "I've needed someone to talk to about all this."

"I'm sure he was thinking mostly of your safety." And his. Who could blame Trowa?

"And his." He chuckled lightly into his glass as he tasted his wine.

His echoing my thoughts startled me into looking up. He appeared awfully untroubled for having recently broken up with "the love of his life". I sure hadn't bounced back, even after a month.

"Ummm, these cheese-stuffed peppers are tasty!" he said. "Try one?"

His appetite hadn't suffered either, I observed. "Sure."

"And I don't blame him for the warnings. I'm not stupid, Heero! I just needed a little help. Being around something dangerous and totally unstable-."

"Are we talking about you or the system?" I asked, meaningfully, but knowing I could intimidate him if I looked too serious, I tagged on a smile and his face lit.

"Ha! Both?" He chugged half his glass of wine before continuing on. "I remember a lot of that event, believe it or not. Things like… I was unable to tell the difference between friend and foe."

"You were strong enough to come through intact," I reminded him.

"I know. So many men suffered mental breakdowns and death."

I had a clear memory of the latter occurring, when some fool OZ soldier obsessed with the capabilities of Wing Zero and the ZERO system got his hands on the suit and challenged the pilot of Deathscythe Hell. That contest had ended predictably with the OZ guy going insane and dying during the battle.

Duo managed to come out just fine. I remembered Duo screaming, and his cackling laughter following. "And another one bites the dust. Oh, yeah, oh yeah!"

God. Why couldn't I get Duo out of my mind for just one night?

Possibly Quatre's thoughts tracked mine right down to that battle, because he hopped up from the table—again- and gave me a quick hug. "I'm sorry about you and Duo."

I had been clutching a glass of water and spilled a little of it in the process. "Hn." I nodded and shimmied a shoulder loose, followed by an arm, and I pushed him away—gently of course. "And you and Barton." I tried to sound sympathetic, even knowing said Barton was currently looking cozy over leafy greens with said Duo.

"Trowa? Oh, yes, of course. Well…"

He sounded for a second there as if he'd forgotten who I was talking about. Had Trowa really meant so little to him? I couldn't believe that. I decided he must have been putting on an act, a pretty good one.

Our dinners arrived, cutting off whatever he'd been about to add, and food took center stage. I was on my fourth glass of wine and felt I could use the protein from whatever source it was I'd ordered.

When I thought I saw his hands flutter like butterflies flitting over a meadow and land on the computer, I regretted ingesting all that wine. I must have imbibed at a faster rate than my body was prepared to process, so I chugged some water and carved up more of the meat on my plate. I let him take back the device so that he'd sit back down and guide the conversation into safer territory.

That this was an unusual date was starting to register with me. There were probably deep-seated psychological reasons why I never got into the swing of dating. Yes, mind-bending, insanity-causing death machines made safer topics than discussing my feelings for the most important person in my life sitting just slightly more than 20 feet away.

"Do you mind?" Winner asked politely, if not unsteadily, fingers poised above the keyboard. "I'm just dying to show you something."

"Go ahead." Die. Show. Anything.

He flipped to another view of Wing Zero and passed me the computer again. I found myself staring directly into the "search eye," and had trouble controlling the urge to shallow hard. I'd used the eye in combat as a device to gather data that the cameras and antennas overlooked. "I always preferred how it returned the information in immediately useful form, instantly calculating the precise position, movement, and weak points of an opponent for me," I said, conscious that he'd know what I meant and appreciate the same things.

"Elegant, wasn't it? It was the same type used by the Shenlong Gundam—the search eye only." Quatre folded his arms over his chest. "I've studied them all, the schematics, but the Zero just draws me in."

I jumped. "Me, too. I thought it was just an after effect of having used it or a fixation that I had since I'd used it longer than anyone else."

"And it might be one or the other or both, but it is something only you and I share."

Before I could contradict or question his facts, he added, "Zechs, for instance, has never given it a second thought."

"Well, his brains were scrambled in other ways," I muttered under my breath, but Quatre heard me and laughed quietly.

"The Lightening Count," he said. "How terrible to have to live up to that name. Not that is was a misnomer. His reactions were quick."

I took the obvious setup, wondered aloud, "Which ones?" and smirked as my "date" laughed. Yes, I wasn't so mature not to take cheap shots. I studied a page of code while imagining my old nemesis "getting off" in record time.

Zechs Merquise had used the Search Eye of the Wing Gundam Zero to track down the Gundam Epyon and its pilot, who'd been me at the time. We never really settled our score, either. That guy had always bugged me and still did.

And yet, I'd let Zechs talk me into this date. Such as it was.

"So, what about that new project of yours?" I asked. "This looks like code for interfacing two different devices together."

"You are looking at it."

"You're building a—" I lowered my voice to a whisper and leaned forward. "-a Gundam? Tell me you're joking."

"Oh, Heero! I didn't mean _that_. All right, not _exactly_. I'm simply modeling a Zero-like system and utilizing the "search eye" technology."

_Oh, is that all? That's so much simpler. _ "There's nothing simple about you or what you do, Winner. Oh, don't give me that innocent look either. I _know_ you, remember?"

"Ha! I guess you do! Well, I'd been thinking about that Zero system for some time." He chuckled again, and I was sure he was jittery. "I just couldn't get it out of my mind, you might say."

"Are you giddy?" I felt light-headed from the alcohol and the noise he made was not at all like Duo's laughter. Was he having an anxiety attack? Trowa told me he could be a little skittish, but I hadn't been clear what he'd meant at the time.

"No! Heero, I was laughing. It was a _joke_."

"I heard it." Joke or not, I decided he'd had more than enough wine for the evening—I certainly had- and poured his remainder into my glass, and left it untouched, for the meantime. I hoped he'd eat more food, and demonstrated by stuffing a forkful of my…steak… past his pink lips.

And he removed the meat from the tines with his teeth… slowly... and then applied his lips… slowly.

I swallowed. Hard. It had been awhile since I'd been with Duo and there'd been no one else, so I permitted myself to react normally to sexual invitation, and not punish my thoughts. I could play along, knowing, pretty much, that neither of us was going to take advantage of the other's vulnerability.

I relaxed, smiled, and said in as gentle a tone as I could manage, "What I haven't heard is an explanation for your studying that dangerous… fascinating device."

He chewed and nodded as he handed down his judgment. "Delicious and tender."

He reached for his wine glass, noted that it was empty, as was the bottle, and signaled the waiter. I pushed his water glass closer and un-signaled the waiter.

The return of the tiny frown puckered his brow for an instant, fading away to reveal a speculative expression. When I tried, I was very good at reading faces. I just couldn't read faces of people who were better at hiding.

Quatre wasn't hiding much, that I could tell, or he was just manipulating me, showing me what he wanted me to see? Not that it mattered. I didn't care. I was enjoying his company, that of a good friend in the making, and his challenges, which included learning how to put him at ease around me. I wanted to study him and his hobby.

"I did have hope of combining the features and turning them into an interrogation device," he revealed smoothly.

NO! "Interrogation? Who-?"

And before I could complete that line of questioning, he followed one bombshell with another. "For development purposes, though, what I desperately need is someone who has used it successfully-"

Ah, ha. Here's where I came in. "Like me."

"Well, yes. There is Zechs Merquise as well—"

Immediately I said, "Leave him out of this. He was brain-damaged goods enough without another bout or two with Zero." My next reaction was "Count me in!" but first I'd like his response to a couple dozen questions that are piling up in my brain.

Then his handheld computer buzzed. "Excuse me; it must be urgent if they are attempting to contact me through this."

He stepped out of the way and I considered his words. Interrogation device? For whom, his business? Surely not. That would be unethical. For Preventers then? I would absolutely have to keep an eye on him. _It's always the nice, peace-loving guys that have to be watched._

His call only took a moment and then he turned back and took my arm.

"I'd like to discuss the psychology of the zero system with you in detail. Let's go to my place where I can show you the R&D facility I'm considering, and since it's a bit out of the way for you, I can offer you a guest room. Unless you have pressing plans? Oh! Do you want dessert?"

Ah. No. "I don't care for sweets and I have no plans tonight. All right. I have a few questions of my own, as you can imagine."

I glanced over at the other table on our way out and caught Trowa putting away his cell phone while Duo seemed fully engaged with folding his napkin—a nervous habit of his.

"Ready to move on?" I heard Trowa ask him.

I wondered if I should stop and say something, when Quatre pressed his lips to mine. While my brain was totally consumed with that invasion, he broke it off, and slipped away.

"Ah…" was all I could utter.

Nice kiss. It totally short-circuited my previous line of inquiry. All my previous trains of thought had been derailed by that simple kiss. Damn hormones anyway.

"Thank you for the lovely dinner. Now, this way," Winner said. He tugged on my hand and dragged me away out the door.

Along the way, I wondered what I'd been intending to ask.

I wondered what I was getting myself into.

I wondered what it had been that Zechs had said to convince me that this would be a good idea.

I didn't wonder why Trowa hadn't been able to refuse this man anything.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

**Why Me? **

**Chapter 3**

* * *

**(o) Zechs' POV**

"Chang Wufei, you are working awfully late on a Friday night. Une riding you that hard?"

"Nuh uh-?"

Nothing comprehensible came out, and the color had drained from his face, so I assumed that I had surprised him with my sudden appearance, or shocked him with some possible sexual innuendo, and I smiled to counteract any bad impression I may have made.

"Sir?" he said, saluting curtly. The gesture wasn't strictly necessary, but he was always deferential to my military status, which I found admirable and very pleasant.

I nodded and watched the color return to his face as he pulled himself together; knowing I'd achieved my first goal, to put him at ease, must have spread my smile to my overall demeanor.

"Merquise, you seem in high spirits this evening."

Indeed, I was both pleased and looking as if I was. "Actually, I successfully carried out a little matchmaking; my good deed for the week."

"Did you?" he said, completely composed now; in fact, a mite smug with the addition of, "That's interesting; so did I."

I didn't mind his arrogance; it was a necessary part of the total, self-confident man, in my opinion. I felt a sudden frisson of excitement tingling through my extremities. Then another notion occurred to me. He wouldn't have been involved in the failing Yuy-Maxwell romance, would he? Not after we argued over how to execute a plan!

"Oh?" popped from my lips before I could stop it.

"Just because I didn't like _your_ plan, didn't mean I was against the _idea_ of it." He stood and adjusted his jacket. "Excuse me. I have a little undercover work to do."

"You haven't a field mission assignment- that I know- so, where are you really going now?" I asked, hoping against all hope it wasn't to reconnaissance the same place that I was.

"Trowa asked Duo on a date. I thought I'd go check—"

"Dear, God. You didn't suggest he take Duo to that new Thai restaurant? Tell me, not to that place, please?"

"Of course there. It was my idea. You rejected it when I suggested—"

"I'm not a Thai man myself. My mistake."

"Then what's the problem?"

My _misunderstanding; _I could see that now. At the time, I'd thought he'd been asking me to dine out at the Thai restaurant first. As a trial. Before sending his friends to eat there. I'd rejected the idea categorically- another mistake on my part, but it had been an impulsive, visceral reaction to the idea of attempting to seduce Wufei while tackling spicy hot food- and before I could suggest a more romantic place of _my_ choice we'd been interrupted by a frantic co-worker. And he'd stormed off to answer the call of duty.

Had he thought I was rejecting his overtures as well? Of course, he had. How could I have made so many mistakes in a row?! Well, Wufei Chang must have charmed me to distraction, that's all I can say. On the spot, lightening quick, I conceived a plan to correct all the wrongs I'd assumed I'd made.

"So, you say you are going to go spy on them? Oh, don't look at me that way." Actually, I adored his prissy-mad expression. "Let's just call it spying and, well, frankly, so was I, only… and you won't believe this… I set up Winner with Yuy."

"What?!"

I'd shocked him with the knowledge of my adroit matchmaking.

"And you sent them to the same restaurant? They are there, together, NOW?!"

Or, possibly shocked him with the ugly possibilities our miscommunication brought forth.

"Yes." _Now_, at this very moment. "Oh dear." I couldn't help from sighing, fatalistic as it sounded.

"So we carried out independent schemes to get those two idiots back together and ended up bringing them all to the same restaurant at the same time?" he summarized.

"This could turn out terribly," I concluded.

He matched my sigh with a weary one of his own. "And after all the trouble I went to."

"Yes, I know," I commiserated like the blamable cohort that I was. "Lighting the fire beneath Yuy's ass wasn't any swim in the tropics."

I felt relieved when he looked me in the eye and smiled. Yes, he'd enjoyed our accidental meeting in the Bahamas, too. Of course it hadn't been any accident on _my _part. I was still paying Une back for giving me that emergency time off which enabled me to join Wufei.

How attracted to me was he, though, I wondered? How deeply?

"So, what should we do now?" he asked. "Go in and stop this nonsense or just wait and see?"

Could I take it as a promising sign that he now deferred to me? I'd just have to believe it was and ask him out.

"I vote for the latter. I don't think there is anything more we _can_ do, no way to make things better by our further interference. In a way, it's like watching a strip tease. Don't ask how it's done; just enjoy what's coming off." *

I did like the way a smile warmed his face. "We should team up on this operation," he suggested.

"Wise idea. Undertaking surveillance of a dangerous nature requires backup."

"And is far more pleasant with company," he agreed. With little further fuss, Wufei accompanied me to my vintage Jaguar and snuggled into the butt-hugging leather seats.

"Comfortable?"

"Perfectly."

"Excellent, then on to the restaurant. Thai Jungle, correct?"

"Ah, yes. I _had_ suggested it from the start."

"I acknowledged the wisdom of _that_ choice already."

"Yes, yes you did."

I avoided looking at his face. I could feel the smug expression and hear it in his voice. That was sufficient, I think.

We took up our watch from across the street, using a parked van for camouflage. He borrowed my binoculars, his being in his car back at Preventers. I wasn't all that interested in watching Huey, Dewy, Louie and whomever, not with the exotic, the prickly, the hotter than Sahara sun Chang Wufei in my car.

"I see them."

"Both couples?"

"Yes."

"At least they made it through this much of a meal in close proximity of each other without blowing up the place." I chuckled lightly and won a little laugh in return.

We shared a warm moment and then continued our watch on the door. Several minutes later, the first of the couples emerged intact, followed several minutes after that by the second.

"And… there goes couple number two."

I had to point out the obvious flaw. "Paired up incorrectly still, but, somehow they ought to sort themselves out."

"Eventually, but that might take time. Our job here is done, what little there was."

"I agree. Mission over. The real work, you'll agree, was in the preparation phase. We make an extraordinary team—" Before I could sing our praises any more, especially since we hadn't teamed up particularly well during the crucial planning part, I noticed he was preparing to leave. "Where are you going?"

Wufei didn't take his hand off the door handle, but he didn't engage it either. He turned to me sitting there behind the driver's seat before answering in tense, clipped sentences. "Inside. I'm here. I haven't eaten and I'm famished. I like Thai, so I might as well see if I can be seated. I'd invite you, but I already did and you refused. So, goodnight-"

Ah, I'd nearly failed to progress fast enough and was about to lose my momentum. This was my moment. My move. I took it. "May I suggest an alternative?" I lifted a single platinum eyebrow and observed his eyes track the movement.

Wufei attempted to look carefree, but sounded intensely interested; either that, or I was being overly hopeful. "You may, but be quick about it… for all those reasons I just stated."

"Lobsters, champagne, view of the harbor?"

That stirred his curiosity. "Lobsters?" His eyes glazed over. "I've never tasted one."

I nearly grinned with pleasure, but managed to control the spread of my smile to stretch slowly. "I _know_ you like fish. I made reservations. I'm sure the table can be set for two."

Fish. Yes. That unexpected rendezvous in the tropics had opened Wufei's eyes to new possibilities. Dating aristocracy—an enlightening experience he might desire? Being seduced by Zechs Merquise—exquisite, possibly?

"I've never eaten lobster," he repeated with a bit more wistfulness this time, "and wasn't certain if they weren't the stuff of poetry and dreams only."

He settled back into his seat and closed his eyes. Since he didn't look like he was going anywhere, I started the engine and signaled to pull out. "Think of them as big shrimp, which sounds silly so they made up the name 'lobster' instead."

Wufei liked a man with a good sense of humor, he'd said once, and smiled appreciatively at my feeble attempt at a joke. "The best parts of this planet are the oceans."

"Hmm, that's because you lived on a colony all your life. The mountains, valleys, and deserts are enjoyable, too."

"You've traveled everywhere, then?"

"Oh, not really, but I have a villa here, a cabin there… Perhaps you'd be interested in the higher elevations this weekend, if you have no other plans?"

"Higher elevations? I assume that's slang for something?"

"No, no, no. I meant, if you could alter you plans, I'd love your company at my mountain retreat. There's skiing, if you're interested."

"Skiing, yes, of course." With a bemused look, Wufei must have concluded that, indeed, his work-week had ended. "You mention plans. My regular appointment at the dojo shouldn't be put off."

"You won't be without a workout of a different sort, should you choose." I tried not to appear too wolfish when I smiled down at him expectantly.

"I see. Well, in that case, no, I have no pressing engagements that can't be changed."

Very good. Very, very good. "La Mer followed by a stop at your apartment to collect a change of clothes, and then we are off to wintery Glenwood."

**(o) Trowa's POV**

"Duo wants—"

"Not _now_," his whispered voice snapped through the cell phone, cutting me off. Quatre could whisper sweet nothings, all right, but he could also pull off his **command voice** at will. "I should stick with Heero," he added.

I kind of wanted Quatre to tell me to forget the whole date thing with Duo, and come straight home. "Duo wants me to keep him company at his place. Stay over but—."

"Yes, do that. Good bye—"

"Overnight?" I asked just to make certain he understood.

"Whatever it takes. We agreed to everything, in case something like this came up. I'll keep Heero occupied."

And with that comforting thought, my boyfriend shut off his phone.

Okay, well, I wasn't doing anything wrong. I put away my phone to count out the bills to pay our dinner bill, which took longer than necessary because Quatre's behavior had me confused. I wasn't making passes at Duo and I didn't see why my boyfriend-of-some-time was flirting with Heero. I felt he was carrying out this "date" undertaking far too seriously.

But that was only one problem. An overnight camp out at Duo's was a fresh new problem, which my imagination dwelled upon as we left the restaurant.

I couldn't _believe_ what I'd gotten myself into.

I'd thought at the outset that Duo and I'd have a bite to eat, pick up a few donuts, and then I'd drop him off at his new apartment, before I'd head back home to Quatre.

However—

Duo's apartment, as it turned out, was in the spacer neighborhood, and his appointment to see the little space-jumper up for sale was far earlier than I thought a Saturday morning ought to begin.

Which was why—

Now, we were aiming for the donuts, then a sleepover at Duo's place, then a Saturday crack of dawn appointment at the shuttle launch building.

I escaped to the john and called Quatre again. At least, when I called and explained, Quatre seemed understanding about the _extended duration_ of my plans. He had _plans_ of his own, but he didn't go into details, implying, _again_, that we'd discussed all this earlier and that I shouldn't feel I _had_ to check in with him. I guess I had been a participant in that conversation with him. I didn't remember that conversation. He wished me a good night, tagging on a whispered "I love you" this time, for which I was glad. I'd needed to hear that vote of confidence.

A night with Duo wasn't hot sex with my lover, but it was all right. We watched a couple rented action movies while eating our "donuts" including my personal favorites: one bacon encrusted, another pizza-like, smothered in cheese, and something oozing caramel with pecans. Duo ate one that was so loaded with chilies I could feel the burn without tasting it. We polished off a six-pack then put in a DVD to watch, some atrocious romance movie.

So far, we hadn't uttered one word about Heero or Quatre all night. Truly good. I don't know what kind of shit I would have stepped into had I opened my mouth and tried.

And then… It must have been the alcohol knocking my judgment off kilter, because I missed the clues leading up to it, and our conversation slid into the 'feelings' trap.

"It's really easy being with you. Funny, huh?"

"A little. Hey, we get along fine, because there's no sex involved. That confuses the issue."

"No sex. Huh. Guess that's it. Start talking about feelings with Heero and one thing leads to another and –"

"Spare me."

"Bingo! Back to bed, heh, heh." He looked over at me and grinned. "Can't see Quat being all domineering like that."

"No? Then you don't know Quatre very well." I smiled inwardly as I recalled Quatre backing my ass into the wall the other night, and ripping the buttons off my shirt...

"It's a good thing, right?" I watched his smile go a bit crooked. "I mean, if I had, then you wouldn't have, right?"

"I don't know." I really hadn't followed his train of thought very carefully, what with Quat on my mind, and was slow to catch up. "Wait! Are you insinuating that if you'd gone for him, that I wouldn't have had a chance?" Why I got defensive, I do not know exactly.

"What? No, that's stupid. I meant," and here he paused to make sure I was following his convoluted logic, "that if he and I had a thing going, you wouldn't have interfered."

"Oh." I had to think hard about what he'd said; meaning the wine and beers had bent my brain.

"You wouldn't have, right?" he repeated.

He was so insistent; I really had to come up with a sensible reply. "I don't know." Even I knew I'd failed. I didn't need to look at his "try harder, asshole" expression. "Okay, I might have made my feelings on the matter known to him so he could have a clear choice." I finished off the last of my bottle and stood to get another. If I was going to have to talk about personal shit, I was going to get smashed. "I'm going to the kitchen. Want another?"

"Another kitchen?" Ha, hah. "No, but you can bring me a beer."

"If you're lucky," I muttered with what I hoped was a chuckle.

I carried two cold beers into the living room and offered him one. "You would have done the same if it had been Yuy and me."

I watched his face change expressions and hoped he wasn't going to find a way to twist what I'd said into a dumb joke.

"No, I wouldn't have." Duo was staring unfocused into the distance. "I wouldn't have stuck around. I couldn't have done that." He fell back onto the floor, eyes closed. "That would have hurt too much."

Ah, he still loved him. Great. And how did he feel about him dating Quatre, I wondered? "I point out that you are still here now."

His eyes flew open and he rose onto one elbow to stare directly at me. "He was eating dinner with Quat, that's all. Entirely different thing."

"Oh, so if they're eating that's okay, but if they're fucking, then it's not."

He sighed. "Yes! Geez, Tro' wouldn't that matter to you?"

"Sure, but that's me. I already said I'd push you aside if I thought I had a chance. You said you'd give up and run. That's all."

"Okay, I _said_ that, but I _meant_ I'd let him have who he wanted if that's who he really, really wanted. I know he's not… that he's not… that he hasn't fallen suddenly for Quat."

Interesting. I had been right from the start. I hadn't thought "mission: date switch" would work. Heero and Quatre? Hard to see that going any place. "I can see you with Qua-atre,"_ that_ was hard to admit and get past my lips, "more than Yuy with him, for what it's worth."

"Me and Quat? No way. We're close, but we haven't enough in common to rock a relationship."

"Yeah, but that can develop. Quat and I were pretty far apart, at first. We had the war, our Gundams… Yeah, that was about it."

"You had music in common. He liked to go on about that. You'd play flute and he'd play violin. I'm not the least bit musical."

"I'm low key, you're off-key. Musical."

"Be straight with me."

I stared at Maxwell until he broke up laughing. Tears leaked. He was awesomely hysterical for a minute.

"Fuck! I'm glad you're gay," he said between gasps for air.

"I thought you wanted me to be straight. Make up your mind."

That set him off again, ending with a bout of hiccups. I gave him a glass of water and he settled down.

"I actually kinda get how the Winner lifestyle," he motioned expansively and lightly doused himself with water, "can get to you after awhile."

"Having most anything you want can get old." Okay, I was being sarcastic again, but I wasn't sure what he was getting at and I'd too much alcohol to think very hard.

"All that stuff has a way of owning you." He sat up and then closed his eyes against the sudden motion. Being intoxicated didn't stop him from putting his thoughts into coherent words. I was impressed by his skills. Again.

"Point in case," he said. "I was visiting Quat once when he was putting on some fancy-ass shindig at his work. You were on a case out of town."

"I'm not much for workplace parties." I wasn't much for _any_ large social groupings, and Quatre knew that and was sensitive to my feelings- in the extreme. He arranged events around my timetable and for my convenience, when he could. "He planned things that way so I wouldn't have to make excuses for avoiding parties." I smiled because little gestures like that he did for me proved how much he cared about me.

"Yeah, well, he pulled _me_ in with promises of food. It was all... peculiar...awful stuff... farro and goat... I starved!"

"Oh,yeah, that one." Quatre had told me how the caterers had gone all out to impress the guests and forced Duo to go on a hunger strike. "Heero and I were partnered on the same false-warehouse case at the time. Real cesspool of evil that one—"

"Probably. Anyway, one of the guests – it may have been me—bumped into one of those heavy gold framed paintings he has hanging in the hall, setting off an alarm. Dinner had to wait while he confronted staff and soothed the security guards that all was well. Just saying, you know?"

"I know." There were parts of the Winner mansion I wouldn't set foot in for fear of setting off proximity alarms with just my presence. "The staff has to count the fine silver and lock it in a safe after a party just for insurance reasons."

His big blue eyes gazed at me. "No shit?"

"Truth. Still, the small consolation prizes he awards himself as he struggles through each day are worth it." I may have rubbed my thigh as I recalled the last time he'd taken me in the smoking room.

"Prizes like you."

Oops. I'd slipped up and only then did I realize it.

"You and Quat… you're still together. This entire… thing was a setup."

Duo had plied me with drink, probably twice as much as he'd consumed, and cleverly arranged this mild interrogation. I was rightly a little awed. I certainly wasn't clear-headed enough to lie convincingly, so I didn't try. "Yeah."

"Yeah? I guessed right? Cool. So, _why?_"

"Not my idea," I insisted.

"Well, no shit. I wouldn't have accused you of dreaming up something so…weird."

"Bone-headed."

"Certifiable," he upped the ante again and chuckled.

I bowed my head, grateful for his confidence in my sanity. "Yuy's supposed to see what he's missing, get jealous, or something, and try to get you back. Or something along that line."

"He won't, you know. Get jealous, I mean. If he really thinks someone is in his way, he'll just—."

"Kill the fucker."

"Right. So you're safe. If he cared, that is. Still, he won't buy this any more than I did."

"Didn't think so." I tried to sit up, felt woozy, and just stayed put.

"So, the ship thing? You don't have to go through with that."

"Yes, I do. I want to. That's between you and me, Duo."

I heard him sigh and stretch out beside me. His fingers touched my arm. "Thanks, man. I was hoping that was for real."

"I have to say-" I worked out what I was going to say and ran it past my judgment, and promptly forgot the wording when it came to saying it out loud.

"Don't over think it. Just spit it out. That's what I do," he recommended.

"Okay. This has been a great evening, being with you, talking with you. I just wanted you to know."

"Thanks." Duo actually blushed. "Yeah, that means a lot. It's been the best for me in…a while. Even when I … had Heero, I needed… a friend to talk to about the other stuff he wasn't interested in."

"So, before you crash completely, call him and tell him how you feel."

"Can't. Not yet. But you should call Quat."

And I did.

**(o) Quatre's POV**

Heero dabbed his tongue onto a high-tech device the size of a fingernail. "Good. I'll take us directly to your home, and leave your car at your office."

"Oh?" My confused response must not have been what he'd expected and it earned me a glare and a frown.

"I established that my fast metabolism has processed the wine I'd consumed to within the legal limit for driving. I can see that you should not attempt to drive yet."

_Oh really, Mr. Know-it-all?_ Sadly, he was right, and knowing this irritated me slightly because I could tell I had over-sauced my verves, um, nerves, and become intoxicated. I didn't give him the satisfaction of knowing that and hid behind a shy smile. "That's okay. My car has spent the night there before." My judgment wasn't totally trashed by the wine, but I was having trouble remembering why I'd thought a date would change things for him. I hoped I'd remember soon. At least I still had my sense of humor, which I tested out on him. "Drive on! My sloth-speed metabolism will initiate detoxification when I fall asleep."

He grunted and I closed my eyes to re-think the wisdom of using humor around him.

Oh. Dear. What had I done? Planning to date Heero, getting him to realize what he was missing not being with Duo by being with me? Trying to make him change his priorities so as to move Duo to the top of his mountain of work? It had all seemed logical at one time, but now I was afraid I hadn't given proper weight to the personalities involved.

I thought I had.

Now, I knew differently.

Honestly, I'd given Duo much too much credit and trusted his assessment of Heero too much. He'd said Heero had changed. "Heero's not scary, Quat, he's just a workaholic."

And I believed Duo, since he knew him intimately, while Heero and I had hardly exchanged a hand full of words in the intervening years. I'd seen him at a distance, in passing—and lately he'd looked glum—but we hadn't talked. Trowa had spent more time around Heero at Preventers, of course, which was how I knew our friend was hurting over losing Duo. Trowa had said he seemed okay and we all know what that means: he was suffering horribly over losing Duo. And for Zechs Merquise to call me to voice his concerns over the status of Duo and Heero? What did that have to say about the tilt of the planet? Off-kilter!

Still, this was Heero Yuy, one tough cookie.

I'd been in awe of him as a child-terrorist. His dedication, single-minded determination, and self-sacrifice to the cause came to mind first and foremost. What truly stood out in my fifteen-year-old mind; however, and what fueled my imagination and what I'd venerated was his unholy strength and stamina. I both admired and feared him when he was a boy fighting for his causes, and now years later I discovered that I still harbored that uneasy mix of feelings for him.

He made no attempt to hide his emotions, or even temper them. He radiated intensity from his accusing glare to the unyielding set of his shoulders. Suddenly, I admired my happy-go-lucky friend for having stood up to this man and daring to love him back. I'd only been with him for two hours and already exhaustion was setting in, while Duo and he had co-habitated for years. Was it a wonder that Duo ran way!

I'm sorry. That wasn't fair. Heero wasn't that severe. I was just not used to feeling intimidated.

"Are you feeling okay? Do you want me to stop somewhere for coffee?" he asked. He looked concerned, his eyes kind.

I'd been so nervous; had I'd missed his softer side when it shone through?

"Oh! I'm fine, thank you. Tired, mostly." And confused, a little over my head, and "excited" was in there someplace as well.

He made a sound of agreement and drove on.

And then we were pulling up in front of my home. I wasn't ready to go inside. Not just the two of us. Not just yet.

"It's nice out," he said.

Maybe he wasn't ready to go in either? I went with that and asked, "A walk _would_ be nice, and you haven't seen the mood garden, have you?"

"_Mood _garden?"

"Oh! Did I say 'mood'? I meant 'moon' garden. Silly me. Where is my mind tonight?"

Wherever it was, somehow I'd struck a chord with Heero; he was chuckling.

"Moon? I think 'mood' makes about as much sense. Wait. You're serious. There really is such a thing?" he asked.

"Yes, there is." I quick-stepped past the gate and shrubbery to the opening in the tall hedge, barely visible in the gloom. "See? Well, if the moon were full you'd see better."

Oh, dear. It was pretty dark overall. And the wrong season.

"It's…like a moonscape?" He was trying to be kind, I knew.

"In summer, when the flowers are in full bloom, everything is white, you see, or silvery, and it glows, in a way, when the moon is out, especially. Over here!" Roses, thank God some flowers were open! "You get a sense of what is would be like, don't you?"

"Pretty." He wasn't looking at the flowers, though. He was looking at me. "Romantic."

"Ro… Oh, of course! It could be, couldn't it? Not that I had never thought that, but I wasn't thinking about that right now… not that you're not… I mean. Well, you know?" I hoped he did because I had confused myself. I hoped he wouldn't notice how jumpy I was.

He just stood there with the strangest little smirk on his face.

"What's _that_ look for?" I asked, not liking the knowing smile of someone thinking he was more informed.

"I could ask the same. You are the one that kissed me already tonight."

_Oh, dear. I had, hadn't I?_ With all the courage I could muster, I looked him in the eyes. It was dark so it wasn't the same as in the light of day where nothing was hidden. Still I noticed how relaxed and open he was, as compared to me. I was wound up like a caffeinated cat in a too-small box. I know, because I had only just last week taken one of my cats to the veterinarian after it lapped up the triple espresso Trowa had left on the floor by the chair where he'd been sitting before jumping me... They so loved cream!

"In fact," he went on, "I will."

_Will what? Kiss me? Here? Now? Heero?_

My expression must have been a dandy one. He didn't move closer. "Ask," he said, "what that look means?"

I knew the tricks of debate. I had to turn the conversation back onto him. "My _look_ means nothing, well, honestly, it's _you_. You haven't looked that alive for some time."

And his face fell, darkness settling in again. "There hasn't been anything to be interested in lately."

If Heero expected some argument, I wasn't going to give him one. I was ready to listen to his story.

"He left me. His stuff is still at our place, though. I see him at work. I still…miss… him. It's _hell._ But what can I do?"

"You could discover the root of your problem?"

"I've thought about it. Hasn't he told you?"

I shook my head. Even if Duo had confessed the details of their love life, I wouldn't share that with Heero. As it was, my dear Duo had kept any terribly personal problems to himself.

"I thought he'd told you, of all people, about all my short comings."

"No, he has never complained. He has only good things to say about you." Ever. "Let's go in."

On our way indoors, my hand on the door latch, I paused, thinking I should warn him. "You should know. Trowa's belongings are still here, too."

He said nothing as I led him past a couple ground floor rooms, settling on the study for the duration of the evening, which opened into the library and my research desk.

I had a complete mock-up set of 1/100 sized Gundams and the headset of a ZERO system decorating the walls. He gravitated to them first thing, which I'd counted on.

"I'll get us coffee. Feel free to look at anything." I rang for Amin and placed our orders then poked at the embers to stir flames in the fireplace. I sought comfort in the realness of fire. Sometimes I longed for the deserts of L4 and sitting around a campfire, listening to the glorified stories of bravery from the Maguanacs.

As I reeled from the pangs of my own homesickness, I discovered that I was collecting Heero's feelings as well. The additive factor nearly knocked me out! "Oh, He-ero!" He was so sad.

He shook his head and stepped further away. He needed a hug, I could tell. Despite his move to distance himself, I enclosed him in the most generous embrace I could. I would have shared a kiss, but he turned his face to the side, and then I felt him pushing me away.

"I can't, Quatre. And it's not that you're not an attractive guy."

Can't-? Oh, my! Did he think I was coming on to him! Well, of course he might! "Oh! I didn't mean anything by that!"

"No?"

"Just comfort. Really! You seemed so sad and that's just how I react."

He smiled and I could tell he understood immediately. "Duo's like that. Hands on type. Okay. So," he waved at the computer on my desk and dismissed the entire episode, "is this where you are doing your ZERO research?"

What little I had done, yes. I had to distract him from looking into that too soon. He'd see my modest progress and question me and think it was all a farce, which it was a little bit. I would let him step back from personal things, though. "Wouldn't you rather watch a movie first? I could use a break."

He slumped onto the couch as the big screen rose out of the console. "Fine with me."

The coffee arrived with the most delish little date-filled fig cakes Amin's wife made. We dug into them even though we'd just eaten a large meal, and settled back to watch I don't remember what. An action film from L3. I think.

"Tell me you're watching this and I won't shut it off," he said an hour later.

It wasn't worth lying about. "Not."

You'd have thought I'd shot a current through his chair, the speed at which he arced off the couch. He stooped over my desk and glowered at the dark computer screen as if he were expecting ZERO to materialize if he willed it hard enough.

"There's this you can play with." I opened a cupboard door and revealed the "search eye".

His hands clenched and unclenched. I passed him a small device I kept hidden away.

"Power it on and," I waited for multiple windows to pop up on the monitor, "you can monitor the programing, control the input, and see how the data is stored."

He found the head apparatus and without hesitation rested it on his crown and snapped the connector to the "eye" box.

This was perfectly safe. It merely read certain brainwaves, metered his heart rate, and sorted the data into a complex database, more or less. I didn't expect it to entertain him for long and it didn't.

He played with the data, running the few analytic tools to examine it. "When I think about snails, it shows that I'm disinterested; when I think about Duo, I'm agitated." His dark stare settled on me. "ZERO System for Dumb-asses?"

I laughed nervously, which came out like a giggle and turned into tears. Not manly. Not what I'd planned on.

"Ah?" he sounded very uncomfortable with me. "Sorry?"

But then he hugged me. He initiated it this time. I'd had more intimate contact with Heero Yuy in one evening than all the intervening years since we'd first met.

"Hey, relax. It's okay. I was joking, though, doing a poor job of it." He patted my back and even smoothed little circles over my shoulder blades. It felt nice. His murmuring sounded nice. Everything about him seemed nice, even his wool-jacket smell. "I didn't expect you to let me hook up to the full-fledged system tonight. Honestly, Quatre, I didn't anticipate this much would even be functioning."

I felt foolish to carry on so. I wiped my eyes and sniffed, ready to move on.

"Thank you for… everything. Trowa wouldn't let me near any of the technology."

"For your safety, I'm sure."

"Yes, but I needed… I still need to work through some of my issues and he won't even let me talk about it. I think he has nightmares with me being under Zero's control."

"I wouldn't be surprised. He was nearly killed. But you know he forgave you ages ago."

"Yes, of course. I know that."

"Then what's wrong-? Oh, I see."

"You see what?" I wondered.

"It's me."

"Now, now, Heero. It's not _all_ about you, you know." I think my smile looked as real as it felt and he chuckled. "You fascinated me so much during the war, with your brave stunts."

"Hn. I was just an idealistic, stupid kid. I didn't know better. You had the big picture."

This time I showed teeth like a peal of breakers over the sand. "I still do."

He was handsome wearing the tentative smile that suited him so well.

"I can see what Duo is so attracted to," I said, bringing a blush to his cheeks. "It's really nice just having a friend though."

Heero's shoulders relaxed. "Yes, it is. I hadn't noticed how small my world had become. I probably expected too much of him, wanting him to fill all the roles of friend and lover and… I can be intense, I know."

"About that, Heero," I said cautiously. "Oh, my cell! Pardon me just a moment."

It was Trowa, so I stepped away to take the call. "Hello?"

"Hey, howsit going with you?"

"Fine, was that all?"

"No."

"Something is bothering you, Trowa?"

"Yes. Want a list?"

"I did warn you of your role in the plan—"

"Was this when I was distracted in bed? 'Cause, I missed a few details like watching my boyfriend aggressively flirt with my partner at work."

"I didn't know you'd show up at the same restaurant for your date."

"Another problem."

"What else?"

"Duo _knows_. He figured out what was going one. Don't underestimate Yuy."

"It's not working out like I'd hoped," I admitted.

"Maybe not, but some good can come of it. Duo and I have a little…project we'll be looking into tomorrow."

"Something fun?"

"Yeah, it might be. Anyway, I wanted you to know I love you and miss you so you'll be thinking about me."

"Oh! I-I… well, feel the same. The very same!"

"All right then. Be careful. We'll talk later."

"Yes, yes! Thank you. Good night."

I wasn't sure how to face Heero now. "Well…"

"That was Trowa, wasn't it?

"Yes, it was."

"He hasn't really moved out, has he?"

"What? Well… um, no. I'm sorry. Heero, we are too good of friends not to be honest here," I said.

"This must have been a hard thing for you to do." Heero folded his arms over his chest. "You must know how much Trowa's hating all this."

"I'm more worried about Duo being mad at me for hitting on his ex."

"He's not—"

"He is, Heero! And hurting him was not what I'd planned."

"You concede this was your doing—this… false date?"

"Yes, yes… a bit of a silly plan I'll admit..."

"Close friends hitting on their exes? Yeah, I'd say it's one of your worst. What were you thinking, Winner?"

"We were hoping you'd be jealous enough of Duo dating Trowa to see how much he meant to you and get back together. Oh, dear… that's sounds pretty weak."

"Totally stupid. And Merquise, naturally, that makes sense why he was pushing me. Who else is included in this idiotic stunt?"

I gave up protecting anybody. "Wufei."

"Hn. He hadn't dared to suggest anything to me, although getting us all to cross paths at the same restaurant sounds like his kind of… not at all subtle."

"No," I agreed. "He's not subtle, but I'm not sure he intended for that to happen. I certainly hadn't. It was supposed to take a while, not blow up on the first date."

"So ZERO?" Heero waved his arm over the computer.

"Partially a fabrication to get you interested in me." I felt the heat rise into my hairline and hated the blush response. Trowa adored it, but in front of Heero it was embarrassing, which only magnified the damage.

"I don't know about the interested part." He shot me a quirky little smile. "I was hoping you weren't on the verge of insanity."

"Very funny! If I were, I'd be getting professional help. Trowa wouldn't let me go near a project like that, without hovering over my shoulder."

"I wondered, that's all," Heero said, backing off a tad. "Trowa never mentioned it to me and I can't see you keeping a secret that big from him. So, it there some gadget you are developing; it's not a total fabrication?"

"I've been wanting to look into, well, there's a project I have in mind, and it's not about ripping out your brain functions and replacing them with Fantasyland."

"You're being an idiot now." Heero turned back to the computer interfacing with the "search eye". "You really think there's a safe way to utilize this technology?"

"Yes, I do," I assured him. "I'm not nearly there yet, of course. Just think of communicating with people who are unable to speak! What if we could communicate with coma victims, or—"

"Or with animals," Heero grinned as a look of surprise erupted over my face, "or _aliens_."

"Ha! I hadn't taken it that far." I chuckled along with him.

"There is a lot of potential here both to do good and evil. It's one step away from designing commercials that feed off a viewer's impulses or something."

I rushed to shut that notion down. "I'd have to keep the technology secret and control its applications, certainly, but the medical applications are endless. Imagine brain damaged patients being able to communicate or allowing their doctors to understand them better? It just fascinates me! As I said, Trowa was adamant that I not go it alone with this and yet he has no interest in being tempted by its 'charms,' as he calls the program's attractive features. None at all. And Duo wasn't considered, I mean, he isn't—"

Heero stopped me from saying more. "I wouldn't think him suited to research projects like this."

"My thinking exactly."

"I would like to participate. It's challenging, complex enough to be interesting."

"Yes!" I cried out with excitement.

"And I have plenty of time on my hands."

We caught ourselves staring into one another's eyes and blinked. "I really am glad to have you for a friend, Heero."

"Yeah. It's something I've missed."

"Yes, someone to talk to and share things that, well, a lover can't."

"There's that."

"And find satisfaction in a hobby he doesn't have to be a part of." I was so pleased that this idea struck a similar cord in him. A solution to our relationship woes, perhaps?

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

**Why Me? **

**Chapter 4**

* * *

**(o) Duo's POV**

The next day, I was up with a start, hearing unexpected noises. Then remembering Trowa had stayed over, I got up to check on my guest. We were going to look over a potential "hobby" ship today! I started to sing "There's a bright golden haze on the meadow! There's a bright golden haze on the meadow. The corn is as high as an elephant's eyyyyye—"

We met halfway to the bathroom, he leaving it. "Yo."

"Morning, morning, mooooour-ning!" I couldn't keep the excitement out of my voice.

Trowa's stunned expression couldn't even knock me down _a notch_. He probably thought I was as high as a kite, forget the elephants! Heh, heh… He grunted and tossed the folded blanket onto the couch.

"You didn't sleep on the air mattress?" I asked, looking for it.

He turned to stare down at the shriveled plastic lying amid empty beer bottles and greasy donut bags, testament to our previous night of wholesale gorging. "Until it sank into the floor, I did, then I chose the couch."

"Want anything to eat?" I asked next. Nothing was going to tone down my enthusiasm this day!

Trowa tossed his bangs out of his eyes and answered, "No."

"Good. We can get to the shuttle port that much sooner and pick up something to eat there."

He approved my plan and we were on our way in no time. We skipped past the canteen and got down to the spacecraft first. My passionate interest in what we were doing and where we were seeped over to Tro' after he grabbed a coffee from a vending machine. He contributed a smile.

We sat and waited for the ship's owner to show. I could smell the exhaust and the shuttle fuel and breathed deeply of the noxious fumes that spoke to my misguided youth. The roar and flare of firing space vehicle engines was like the best background music ever. I couldn't sit! I wanted to fly!

Just the thought of flying again got my adrenaline charged!

"I want to fly! Up there! Again!" I punctuated with enthusiastic arm waving. "Flying was my ticket off L2; it meant freedom, manhood- all that stuff."

"Yeah. I know just what you mean." Trowa joined in after drinking the last drop and tossing the cup. "I had the circus performing to get off on, but Heavyarms was power and a step into adulthood."

"Exactly!"

"Are you Maxwell or Barton?" asked a man walking over to their table.

The younger man standing a little behind him chuckled and whispered, "That's Duo Maxwell. You can't miss the braid."

Well, it was my flag!

The owner had brought this assistant techie guy and we all introduced ourselves. The technician opened her up and we examined the craft. Some wear and tear, blown, frayed and damaged areas, but no major- read: outrageously expensive- replacements. Thrusters and engine needed maintenance, nothing Trow-man and I couldn't do in our free time.

"Month or two of work, you think?" I estimated.

I could hear the hope and excitement rise in his voice. "Yeah, maybe less! We should hire out the body work."

"Yeah." I could feel my grin grow. "Boring tedious stuff."

"Best left to experts with dust-free spray rooms," he added in agreement.

Trowa climbed down using the ladder placed just for that purpose. I found handholds, then scrambled and slipped to the ground.

"Hey! That's not the right way to go down!" shouted the ship's owner.

He was right but the man didn't know who I was, what I had been, or how my perverted mind could convolute an innocent statement, obviously.

"I dunno," I said with a wry smile. "I've been told I'm pretty spectacular."

"I should imagine so," Trowa agreed.

I figured he was thinking "sexually creative" as well, and gave him a wink.

The owner stalked off grumbling, but gave us space to talk it over.

"So… whaddya think?" I wanted his frank opinion first.

"Ship's good," he told me, but then he gazed directly into my eyes, "but that you know yourself. It's a commitment, and we're just—"

"Good friends," I supplied. "I can live with that. I trust you to hang in there and complete this with me. I can share my toys."

"Like you did your Gundam?"

"Eh, this isn't that personal a toy." And I met his smile with one of my own. "Yeah, you know I just wanted to be sure you'd considered Quatre's point of view—"

"I have. Quatre wouldn't mind my new hobby taking up a good chunk of my free time."

"Right, yeah, like I didn't hear the irony in that!" I struggled to maintain a balanced point of view myself. I wanted this ship and I didn't want Trowa to back out on the deal, but I hoped he would if it might mean causing a rift between him and Quat. I didn't want to have that guilt hanging over me!

Trowa chuckled a little. "I'm not dense. I really do know Quatre's feelings on that topic. He's complained plenty about the overtime Preventers demands of me. He could make time for _us_- so should I."

"Oh, yeah. He'd love you sharing what precious little free time you have left over with me . No, I do not want to face the wrath of Quat."

"Hey! It's your fault starting all this. You can't renege now. I'll make time."

"Somehow, huh? Okay then." We shook on it, Tro' and I.

All that was left was settling on a price. I was a wheeler dealer, low-balling initially, sensing their limits, and getting us a price considerably lower than Trowa had expected, he told me later. Very affordable.

We walked away with a spacecraft needing TLC and a year lease on a berth for repairs and storage, and he started laughing. You don't much see Trowa laughing like that, so I had to ask, "You okay?"

He shook his head in the affirmative. "You realize that I share almost as much debt with you as I do with Quatre?"

"Scary thought."

"Quatre and I are in a committed relationship. You and I aren't. I feel the difference between friendship and love, but do you?"

Where was I in this process, I assumed was what he was asking?

"Yeah, I do. I propose we have a chat over breakfast."

"Fine. I'm hungry now," he agreed with gusto.

Maybe we should have delved into that hornet's nest instead of stuffing our guts? Truly food for thought.

"I'm no fool," I started out. "I know Quat's not going to be thrilled to share you with me and a ship. You don't have to tell me that he's pretty high maintenance."

"Mostly it's Preventers," he hedged a bit. "He's been bitching about how my job interferes all the time with our lives."

"Oh yeah? 'Ro did that, too. He took a different position which helped, but I dunno if I can. I didn't know what I could do and… well, I do like the excitement of the chase I get with field work. Could I give that up?"

"Oh, you can," he assured me. "Don't tell me Yuy can't cook up something exciting to keep you… primed and pumping."

I nearly choked on my coffee. "Damn!"

He smiled down at his scrambled eggs and hash.

"It broke us up. I don't know…" I hesitated over what to say next.

"I've been looking for a change," he submitted, surprising me a bit. I thought he was a dyed-in-the-wool field agent like I was. "Guess now I'll be looking seriously."

"No longer an agent? You? You'd do that for Quatre?"

"If I want to keep him, I'd better carve out some spare hours in my schedule, because I want to have time for my new hobby."

"Heh, heh, yeah. So, what kind of job do you think?" I asked, interested.

This conversation was actually helping me work through what I'd been feeling since Heero had given up being an agent. Field work, carrying a weapon in particular, was a part of who Trowa was, or had been. But it didn't have to be for him, then what did that mean for me?

"I was thinking… Maybe I'd take that mechanics opening I've been looking over. Quatre mentioned it. Eight to five and leave the job at the workplace?"

"And have two days off a week," I said in a dreamy way. "That I could become accustomed to. No ten week missions end-to-end with a layover in the hospital."

"If you want to fix this new ride of ours and actually get a chance to fly her, you'll need real time you can count on."

"Do you think that will fix things?" I asked, and I wasn't talking about only repairing a ship. From the way he suddenly avoided my eyes, I knew he knew what I was getting at. Getting Trowa to talk feelings was not so different from extracting similar admissions from Heero. Neither guys liked it, or me, prying about. I felt a kind of solidarity with dentists.

"It can't hurt-." Trowa said that, but his expression was one of excruciating pain, muted Tro-style.

Well, too bad. It wasn't as if I started this, was it? "- _Much_," I said, because I'm _so_ funny.

"Duo-," he began and then stopped.

I waited him out. I could be patient as death itself. Heh, heh... I could just lie in wait…

"- you and Heero need to talk things over, then decide if you want to try again."

"Talking to him is like chatting up a brick wall. Rough on sensitive areas."

"Yeah," Trowa muttered and looked to the side where a family toting luggage shouted loudly at the departure delays . He looked like he'd just as soon be traveling with them, or neck deep in a pit of vipers, rather than talking about relationships. Heh, heh… "Yeah," he repeated (to buy him some think-time was my guess), "But going into a conversation where he gives in on some things and you... don't, well, that seems doomed from the onset."

Shit. I hated it when he was right on target. "Yeah, yeah… right. Okay. I haven't been fair," I admitted. "He's right. You're right. I spend more time with Preventers than anything else, and take too many risks—he said that worried him. I'm not really wedded to dicey, nasty missions." My eyes slid over toward our new acquisition. I sure did want to fly.

"It's up to you."

Yep, Big T, it was, wasn't it? It was my turn to make a move, if I wanted Heero back in my life. Trowa would be a great friend to hang with, but… I really was missing 'Ro. I took out my mobile device. "Where did you look up the job openings at Preventers?"

**(o) Heero's POV**

"Do you think we've moved past that awkward date?" I asked. I certainly hoped Quatre was content with how our time together was coming along. He looked like he was suffering the evening before. I know I made him uncomfortable at first, but finding common ground helped.

Horse riding was another of our common interests.

"Our what? Oh! I am not used to how direct you are, Heero. Yes, I can't remember enjoying a gallop so much in a very, very long time! Thank you for suggesting this."

The morning air was crisp and smelled of meadow grasses crushed under the weight of the horses' hooves. Quatre was an excellent horseman and owned a stable full of Arabians. His favorite mount had a coat dappled with grey and was full of spunk. He let me choose, and I picked a spirited white mare that could run like the wind.

"My pleasure," I assured him. "It's something I've missed doing. Duo wouldn't go near a horse by choice, not even to touch one."

"That's not too surprising, but I bet you wouldn't guess Trowa won't ride with me?"

"Didn't he ride horses in the circus?"

"I suppose. Trowa _likes_ the animals, but his appreciation just doesn't go as far as riding, although he _could_ if pressed." Quatre smiled and shook his head. "With so little time to spend together, I'd rather it be doing something we both like, don't you think?"

"Absolutely."

We climbed a hill and stopped to enjoy the view. The estate house and its outbuildings were the only ones visible within miles. The horses grazed, contented, at ease with their stable in their line of sight.

"I'm sorry you felt you had to do this for Duo and me," I said at long last. "You should have had this afternoon- last night, too—to be with Trowa."

"Oh! Don't say that! I have no regrets whatsoever! Being in the saddle again has been wonderful! And there is something more at stake here."

I felt his reticence to say what he was thinking, and he was ten horse-lengths away now. I didn't let that stop me from pressing him for information. "And that is?"

"Duo is my friend, too!" he began defensively. "I couldn't stand back and let him waste his life like that! There's a better view from the next hill."

Waste his life… _with me_? Is that what he meant? What was he saying?! I chased after him. I could tell he was upset, but his insights were worth listening to. I brought my horse alongside his. "Waste it … _how?_"

"That terrible infiltration assignment." He looked as if he'd bit into a sour lime, expecting a sweet orange.

"Which one?"

"Don't tell me you really didn't know?"

"Quatre. I have no idea what you are referring to. Just start at the beginning and keep it simple."

He brought his horse to a stop. "You need to know. All right. Right after Duo moved out, Trowa told me he had a few rough interactions with some criminal—I don't know the specifics—someone that had been arrested. Let's just say his commander wasn't pleased with what Duo did and considered putting him on a leave of absence."

"Not a bad idea," I acknowledged. Duo and I could have, maybe, worked on our problems with time to be together.

"We all thought so, except Duo."

"What did he do?" I asked, sighing, expecting to hear something I wouldn't like.

"He volunteered for some awful, endless infiltration job. Trowa mentioned Columbia drug trafficking."

"Shit. There's always one of those available for an agent with a death wish." Oh, Duo…

"Trowa attended the same meeting and argued against the assignment and the entire operation."

"He would. He's had something to live for since he's been with you."

"Thank you, Heero. I hope so. But Duo has, too, and he had no business offering to go on a hopeless mission, no matter how dark he thought his future might be."

"He didn't go," I pointed out.

"No, he didn't. Trowa volunteered to go as back up if Duo insisted on the assignment, and then Zechs called for a break. Trowa told me Merquise had given him his word that he'd make sure the mission never happened and that Duo would be re-assigned. Anyway, as far as Duo was concerned, the meeting broke up for further discussion and the entire operation has been deferred for the time being."

"Zechs." So, _that's_ how he had become involved in our relationship problems.

"Yes, he was mindful of the mental stress Duo's been under, ever since he and you broke up."

"So, you and he and Wufei- for some reason he couldn't keep his nose out - thought up this… mixed up dating scenario to fix things?" And undeniably Zechs made certain we all had this weekend available. I waited to see a curt nod from my riding partner, before adding, "He's certifiable; you know that?"

"You keep reminding me that's how you feel about our favorite count," he replied with a smile. "And I agree that in the past he was unreliable when everything was failing around him, but lately I find he's a brilliant observer."

"I don't know what more I can do to make a relationship work with Duo," I said honestly. "If he won't make the time for us, then what more can I do? My next step is to just quit Preventers entirely so we don't run into one another."

"I'm sorry," he said, offering me some sympathy. From anyone else, it might sound insincere, but not Quatre.

"I don't want to lose him," I admitted. "I don't know how others feel or deal with it."

"It? With _love_, you mean."

"Yes." I don't know how he could say "love" aloud without blushing. I couldn't. I hadn't even said the word to Duo.

"How did you know it was love, Heero?"

"How?" Not the question I was ready for, but I decided to find out what Quatre was getting at. "I wasn't sure it was, but it struck me one day- like a punch, actually. When I looked at Duo, all I wanted was him to feel the same about me. How could I win him? What could I offer? All that and more ran through my head. But Duo let me know in mysterious ways that I couldn't do any of that, including an actual punch to the arm. I'd have to earn his heart, share a piece of mine, prove my worth, and then let him make the final choice. And I thought I'd done all that."

"You did, Heero. You two lived together for almost a year."

"And then to lose him…" God, just thinking about it, my throat tightened enough to choke me. "It's awful."

"If you feel that strongly, there's hope, Heero."

I nodded and focused on relaxing enough to speak. "Maybe. Now, I wonder if there are words that could make him mine again?"

Quatre smiled and reached across my horse to pat my arm. "I believe that Trowa's capable of showing Duo a thing or two about making time for what's important." He wiggled his cell phone at me. "He messaged me to say he's learned what he has to do to help him and me, and that Duo's on the cusp."

"Cusp? Trowa used the word 'cusp'?"

"It's shorter to type than 'borderline'."

"Cusp. Well I hope it's a good place, then. Duo's not one to vacillate for long. Trowa say anything else?"

"Why, yes, he did."

"And that's why we only rode in a loop and the horses are on their way back to the stable?"

"Yes! You are so—"

"I am observant, I know, Quatre. Just tell me what the plan is."

"Ha, ha! Very well. We are going to meet Trowa and Duo for lunch. A nice place. And we can talk."

"I don't know if I can—"

"Try?"

Why fight them all? "All right."

I felt his hand on my knee. "Thank you."

We rode on, heading back down into the valley. I breathed deeply and settled my nerves.

"So, how do you and Trowa make time for one another?" I asked, letting the horse go the way she wanted. Once "home" was in sight, there was little I could do to steer her otherwise.

"Well, that's been a problem, just like for you and Duo." He stared off into the distance, looking for answers, maybe?

"Would you leave Winner Co. for him?" I asked. I was anticipating his pained expression, but didn't get one.

"I do like running a business, but Winner Corp is so large and cumbersome. There's family fighting over directions and the internal power struggles are enough to kill me. I also think I'm more of an entrepreneur and would like to start something of my own."

"Interesting. I didn't think you'd divorce the family."

"Ha! It wouldn't be that hard. I'd have more time, or could make it, but … there isn't much point. Trowa's field work eats away at his time just as much. We never can plan a thing."

"But his message said—"

"Something nebulous yet optimistic." Again, Quatre smiled. "So I'm hoping right along with you, too! Oh, you look so sad, Heero!"

"I need to show up with something to offer, some solution. I'm at the point where I might do anything to have Duo back. That's what I'm thinking. Maybe I should return to field work? At least then we might share missions once in a while."

"No, no, no. That's backwards thinking. Having a few alternatives in mind wouldn't hurt. What if we both tried something really fresh and unexpected?"

"What have you in mind; I know you've come up with something."

"I have. What do you think of this? We could work on this Zero-application project full time and start a small company?"

"Won't that necessitate a huge time commitment? What about your current company obligations-?"

"Yes, I'll need some time to disconnect myself from the day-to-day operations, but that's not the biggest stumbling block. A start up can be a time sponge, but it doesn't have to be."

"Okay… Well… If I quit, it would leave my job open at Preventers. Duo is the best qualified person I know who could fill it…" my voice trailed off as my thoughts turned inward. I wondered if Duo would go for it.

"Trowa has been looking at other job prospects—without much urgency, I have to say."

"He and Duo are both adrenalin junkies," I observed.

"Trowa likes guns. They should both take up target shooting," Quatre said making his disapproval face. "If we all made changes for the better, to do things we are happy doing and are good at, while also restricting our work hours and leaving time to do things we enjoy with our lovers and friends, maybe all our problems will resolve themselves?"

Would it all fit into place for a change? "I'd like that to happen."

"We have a proposal to put out, then." He climbed down from his horse and let the stable man take both horses away. "It's always good to go into a meeting with a plan in place."

"That's what I said. And I thought this was going to be a lunch date."

"Oh, it is. We just want to be in control of the outcome. Come on! Let's get cleaned up and changed. We have quite a drive ahead of us. This will be great fun!"

I may have liked Quatre more when he feared me.

**(o) Wufei's POV**

"We can't loll about in bed any longer," Wufei insisted. "It isn't…seemly." _How can that man sleep when the sun is up already!_

"Ah, now that's the Chang Wufei I haven't heard for several hours," Zechs said, fending off a punch to his midsection and dragging the smaller man back to his side.

"I mean it! I've missed breakfast already. And, no! You may wipe that expectant look right off your face. I don't consider sucking dick a dining experience."

Wufei had intended that to be funny. A laughing Zechs was an awake Zechs and he had plans that entailed they be at a certain restaurant at a certain time and their mountain retreat was an hour's drive away. They never made it past Wufei's apartment the night before. A good night's sleep before driving to Zechs' cabin- it _had_ sounded reasonable, and _would_ have been had they _actuall_y slept. Instead they had indulged themselves until very, very late.

When Zechs tugged on his arm in an attempt to entice him to share a shower, Wufei had to put on the breaks, again. "Absolutely not! It's not… hygenic. We'll be messing around and miss lunch."

"Hmmm? Are you really all that hungry, _my_ Wufei, or do I detect a cunning counter maneuver going on in the background?"

"Nothing terribly cunning about it, if it's that apparent, and I … ah… wasn't, actually, attempting to hide it." I was caught off guard by possessive sound coming from the "my" part of that.

"It?"

_What had I been talking about?_ "It? Yes, it. Our luncheon date." _There. It was said. All was revealed._

"Ah, I see. We aren't dining on the way to the cabin. We are doing _what_ first? Spying on which couple?"

"Both, and we won't be spying. Exactly."

"Observing the outcome to make certain the sanctioned alliances are achieved?"

_Drat, there was no hiding anything from the man. _"You make it sound like a military movement—"

"Or a political détente? Or a little of both, I think. Well, as long as it doesn't take all day. I have plans of my own, necessitating we arrive at the cabin in order to carry them out."

I was about to quiz him further, but he waggled a finger and shook his head "no" as he stepped into the bathroom and closed the door.

It could only be good. Zechs was a fabulous lover who didn't push for more than I was willing to do. Penetration would be out of the question for a good long time, and he seemed perfectly willing to accommodate my wishes.

I listened to the spray of water and with little effort imagined the water flowing over his magnificent naked body. My mind took it a bit further, taking me on a fantasy journey into the steamy shower, where I wrapped imaginary arms around his, intertwining slippery limbs, and enjoying the illusionary experience tremendously.

"Wufei?"

I jumped. Eyes flying open out of my day dream. Zechs towered above me wearing a towel and a leer that made my knees weaken. "That was fast."

"Really?" he asked and gave me a curious look. A long sweep of hair was dry; he must have worn it up in a towel out of the spray. How considerate of him to hurry preparations along! "Your turn, unless you've had a change of heart?"

"No." I tightened the knot on my robe and squeezed by him. I must have been deluding myself to think he'd let me pass un-molested.

He had me in a tight embrace, my toes hardly touching the ground, and grinding a kiss into my face. Before I could pass out from lack of air, he pushed me aside, set me on my feet, and patted my ass.

"Hurry now!" he said.

I was on fire from his touches and shot into the shower for a cooling bath.

We did make it to the restaurant five minutes before the other two couples arrived; fortunate, because it allowed us time to find seats where we could observe but not ourselves be seen.

"There's Trowa and Duo. They look happy, don't you think?" Zechs asked.

_Maybe too happy_. "If _only_ it were Heero and Duo looking _that_ happy, then we could leave with a feeling of accomplishment," I said.

"We'll simply have to wait to find—Oh, not so long a wait."

Zechs seemed all too much amused by the pantomimed greeting of the two couples, friends, comrades in arms, brought together by forces more powerful than any single human could understand and now the ties being reconstructed with what amounted to chewing gum.

"You mustn't look so glum," he said. "See? Duo and Heero are returning smiles. Isn't that an improvement?"

It was. "Barton looks the most relieved." I couldn't help but notice.

"Possibly, but I'd say Winner may have aged overnight."

"Yuy can be intense and if Winner's empathy is real, I could imagine him looking strained today."

"Not too strained, it appears, to do most of the talking." Zechs shook his head at the offer of menus and ordered for the both of us what he knew I'd eat, saving me the time and worry over superfluous details.

"Thank you. What you ordered sounds fine."

We nibbled on warm buttered bread and surreptitiously watched the other table every few minutes. All seemed to be going well there. No yelling.

Our main courses arrived: broiled filets of unidentifiable fish, yellow rice, and steamed vegetables. Perfectly acceptable. The waiter refilled our glasses and left smiling.

I tested the water and must have made a face. I have never liked ice in mine.

Zechs offered to spoon out the ice into his glass and trade me his lemon slice. "Permit me?"

"Thank you." I liked the sour citrus addition and he didn't. We paired up suitably.

"Mommee!"

The screech was the only warning before the little hellion child ran pell-mell around the tables and knocked Zechs' elbow sideways. Ice scattered across the table. Ice flew in the air. Ice water sloshed across the table and into my lap.

"Ahhhh!" I screamed and hopped to my feet.

Zechs reached my side inside of a second, toweling me off with his napkin and beseeching me to alternatively "forgive" him and "shut up".

Standing here, breathing in Zechs' smell- that intoxicating mixture of male and musky aftershave that was uniquely him- every time I inhaled, was arousing me, and it shouldn't! There were other patrons of the restaurant next to us. That should have been a turn-off - thinking of ice water—of titanic proportions! It should have been enough to eradicate even the most potent dose of lust ever created.

But it wasn't. Not with his ministrations to my pants. Something started growing in size in my shorts, which had no business doing so under the circumstances, and my eyes widened in shock.

"Stop it!" I hissed. I pushed away his hand before I castrated myself with the butter knife.

"Hey, look!" came a shout from across the room. "It's 'Fei and our fearless leader!"

I froze in place. Our eyes met and Zechs whispered, "I'm truly sorry for this."

"It wasn't your fault," I admitted. I cast about for the guilty child to blame, but the little demon had disappeared.

There was no avoiding the other couples now. Winner had the staff rearranging tables to fit us all and move our plates over to join the crowd. Lovely. Luckily, my slacks were of a color and fabric that didn't discolor when wet and most of the water ran off anyway, so I looked presentable.

"I'm moving back with Heero!" Duo announced right off the bat, as he would say. "Yeah, and changing jobs."

"Really? Leaving the field?" Zechs asked, sounding surprised. "What will you do?"

"Well, if you approve and all, there's this IT posting that's about to open and it's mine, giving you all a seamless transition." Duo and Heero locked eyes in an almost dreamy kind of way.

_Oh Lord. How much more of that would I be able to take?_

Heero spoke up. "He is referring to my position. I will be leaving Preventers, in fact, when my two weeks' notice is over, starting on Monday."

"Yeah, we talked it all out and things will get better from here on out," Duo said in a manner indicating that he believed it was true and could happen.

"And Trowa will be making a change too," Quatre said.

Trowa cleared his throat. "Um, yeah. Seems I'll be leaving too… two weeks and all…Monday… like Heero."

"Is that so? We'll be losing our two best field agents?" Zechs said. He sounded cross and for a moment we all sat in silent thought, and then he smiled. "About time."

Duo laughed aloud and the others looked relieved enough to chuckle.

Trowa, it turned out, had found a terrific opening in ship maintenance at the shuttle port. With his background and experience, he'd be managing a crew of twenty after a month's training. Quatre couldn't have looked happier, I thought.

"We just needed to sort things out," Duo said.

"Set priorities and agree on them," Heero clarified.

"I'm happy to have someone interested in fixing up a space craft and share flying again," Trowa said. "Oh, did I mention Duo and I bought a fixer-upper?"

"An investment!" Duo corrected. "It will be great. You all gotta come see her."

Heero buried his face in a hand and said nothing.

Quatre smiled and patted his back. "Don't worry. You'll get to see more of Duo than ever before, in spite of the fixer-upper."

"Hn."

"You know I how pleased_ I_ felt to have someone to share my interest in modeling a Zero-like system and turning it into an interrogation device." Quatre grinned when he said that so none of the rest of us knew that he was serious, even if only partly.

I felt Zechs tense as he spoke up. "Pardon?"

Heero sat up and shook his head. "I'll be helping him so you can trust nothing too crazy will go on."

"This coming from the man I brought back from the dead after blowing up his Gundam?" Trowa asked him, although he looked steadily at Quatre.

"We will be working on perfectly harmless applications," Quatre said. "I promise."

"That's too bad," Zechs muttered under his breath. "You had me interested in that interrogation device for a second."

That caused a twittering and chuckling of nervous laughter and all the stress seemed to fade off. Even the staff, hovering about clearing dishes and bringing new ones and waiting for the next water glass to tumble, smiled more freely.

With their most immediate problems solved, their other problems would have to sort themselves out later. So, it appeared, everything worked out fine. _At last_, Wufei thought, he wanted to eat, leave, and see Zechs' cabin.

"So," Duo drawled. He wore his scheming face today, and I didn't like it opposite me. "Gonna tell us about what you've been up to?"

"You and Zechs seem very happy today," Quatre added, in case I didn't grasp Duo's meaning.

"We had a lovely drive to get here," Zechs inserted. "I'm hoping for time to drive through the pastureland next."

Nice save.

"There are no pastures between here and Sanc," Heero pointed out.

"Roundabout way," Zechs said airily, fooling no one.

"Uh, huh," Duo said, unperturbed and yet not entirely put off. "Well, you do that. But you can bet over drinks one of these days I'm gonna pry the good story out of one of you."

But not this day.

Zechs and I parted from them on good terms with promises to meet again Monday night to toast the upcoming parting from Preventers.

"Well, that's that," I said, brushing off any lingering sap from my hands. Heero making liquidy-love eyes at Maxwell was sap defined.

Zechs smiled and kissed my cheek. "I love a happy ending."

"The story was a romantic comedy, what did you expect?"

"No problem; I said I liked it."

"It was stupid. In what universe can two people like each other and yet manage to become engaged to their best friend and somehow not figure it all out until the day of the wedding?"

"I believe you have this story confused with another. No one became engaged here—"

"No?! Well, that's immaterial to my point. I mean, if this were how people ordinarily acted, then there'd be no human race."

"These are gay men. They wouldn't have produced offspring under any circumstance, however, if you see a lack of population to be a problem-?"

"No! Of course not. I was referring to plot plausibility. People aren't that dense, is all I'm saying, and yet we are expected to just ignore normal human behavior and accept - What? What's so funny?"

**The End.**

**Thank you for reading!**


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